Concoct
by ChickWG
Summary: When a last breath is not the last. Set after One More Day
1. Part 1: Chapter 1

**Author's note:** I should say, that this story is not intended to be a one-shot and there are other parts forming but unfortunately due to time constraints it may be a one-shot if it is not worth pursuing. I wanted to start from a different point with this story, it is set three years after One more day and is AU which is apparent in the story. I actually got the idea for this when reading 'My Pictures of You' by Specialatedk14, so I'm hoping that they don't mind me piggybacking somewhat. Feedback is always appreciated.

**Chapter 1**

PJ slowly made his way up the staircase leading to the second floor of the hotel, each step creaking underneath his weight in protest. He had haphazardly made his way here, hectically weaving his way through the assortment of traffic that only Melbourne could offer. He checked the note in his hand for the hundredth time although the numbers were well etched into his brain. Room 207. He quickened his pace slightly as he reached the platform, glancing at each door before stopping at the allocated room.

He stood, body tensing. His eyes did not move, not even blink as the numbers glared back at him.

Truth.

He lived by it. He had made a career out of it. Unfortunately, he had never given much thought to belief. His eyes stared at the numbers. He had not idea what truths he believed in any longer.

They said she was alive. His Maggie. Alive.

He shifted his shoulders to relieve the tension emendating from his neck, his outward exterior calm while internally he was sure his nerves were short-circuiting, anxiety choking him. He shut his eyes briefly allowing the memories to calm him, allowing himself to remember her. The feel of her skin, her voice, her smell of her hair, the way her eyes would sparkle with amusement when she teased him, smolder with desire and if he had really put himself in it, burn with rage. God he had been fighting like hell not to let those memories fade, always afraid that the last semblance of her would dissolve over time. Memories just were not enough. Never had been. Now perhaps, they might not have to be.

PJ's eyes snapped open at the last thought. For that split second, he had almost believed it

His hand moved to the doorknob, his fingers curling around the handle. She was on the other side. Waiting for him. He felt his heart constrict as emotion began to swirl in his head and he hesitated as another assault of emotions hit him, this time unexpected.

Pain.

Anguish.

Hurt.

The feeling escalated, forming a lump in his throat, choking him as he tried to calm his conflicting emotions. Every day of the last three years spiraled into his mind.

Grief.

Tears.

Numbness.

Misery.

He felt the familiar tears prick his eyes and he choked as her dull lifeless eyes stared back at him. The haunting music that marked her procession echoed in the empty hallway. The uneven grooves of her urn burned his fingertips, reminding him, consuming him.

One phone call.

One phone call could have prevented it all.

She would never have been a distant memory.

The call had come.

But three years to late.

He took a deep breath, clenching his jaw in determination as he swung open the door, despite everything he had to know. Had to know the truth.

His eyes instantly met with hers and he knew. She was alive.

He wanted to reach out and touch her. Wanted her more then she could know.

But she was a ghost.

And he fled.


	2. Part 1: Chapter 2

**Part 1-**

**Chapter 2**

Maggie's whole body trembled as she stared at the open door, mind unable to comprehend what had just occurred. She felt the first hot tear spill down her cheek, trickling a clean line down her face, as the shock began to ware away. Her lip began to tremble as realization set in and another tear fell as she began to weep in earnest. The door rested on the latch, slightly ajar but she did not have the strength to lift herself off the bed, did not have the will to eliminate the one sign of his presence. Her body ached as she rested her head on the pillow, curling herself into a ball, legs tucking up to her chest as she allowed the sobs to escape, the hope she had kept for the past three years eradicated in an instant. She cursed herself inwardly for her foolishness, she had known things could not be the same, logically she knew but truthfully, she had never really believed it. In her heart, she had always believed that he would want her, always at her core believed that once he knew, he would be at her door. She bit her lip as the tears flowed silently. She had never really believed it until today.

PJ rested his head against his forearm as he leant on the steering wheel trying to calm his haggard breathing. He had barely made it down to the hotel car park and into his car before he had collapsed in the driver's seat, gasping for air, head spinning with confusion. She was alive. Her eyes had met his and she was there, his Maggie was there, staring back at him. Night after night, he had dreamt that he had saved her, now she was merely footsteps away but something was stopping him. The surge of anger had been unexpected and he took a deep breath as he struggled to determine what to think, what to feel. So many questions left unanswered and he shook his head at the thought, glancing back towards the hotel, so many questions left unasked he corrected bitterly, angry at his weakness, at his reaction.

It was never suppose to be like this.

Clenching his jaw with raw determination, mind made up, he looped his keys around his finger and stepped out of the car. Shoving his trembling hands into his pockets, he strode back towards the hotel.

The glass doors opened as PJ reentered the lobby making his way towards the lift, ignoring the curious gaze of the receptionist who had watched him stalk out the hotel only minutes prior. He could feel his palms begin to sweat as he watched the second number light up, chiming as the steel doors opened on the second floor.

He followed the hallway along, his legs heavy as he nervously reached her room. At the sight of her partly opened door, his heart skipped, instantly fearing the worse and he felt his legs quicken as he closed the distance. In that split second, he knew he could not leave. Slowing as he creped to the crack in the door, he felt his heart constrict for an entirely different reason. Her muffled sobs pieced his ears as he watched her huddled on the bed, her face hidden by the pillow. Protectiveness surged through him at her distress and he wanted to reach out to her, gaze lingering on her tiny frame, so much more fragile than what he remembered.

Maggie felt the hairs on her neck prick and she shifted slightly, senses suddenly aware even in her haze. Her eyes flicked to the door and she gasped, shocked to be met with intense blue. She felt her body go still, her sobs dissipating as she refused to turn away.

PJ felt his breath hitch as she met his gaze, waiting. A large part of him was screaming at him to run, but he knew he would hate himself forever. Taking a deep breath, he creaked the door open slightly, as he stepped through the threshold, firmly shutting the door behind him.

At the click of the door, Maggie swung her legs down so that she was sitting upon the bed, facing him. He stood before her, unwilling to venture any further forward.

They sat there in silence.

Neither saying a word.


	3. Part 1: Chapter 3

**Part 1: Chapter 3**

PJ eyed her silently, taking in her appearance, the subtle differences. Her hair was longer, slightly layered across her face, a few more lines around her eyes but they were all insignificant. This was his Maggie and he felt his body tremor slightly.

"H-ey," he finally managed, his voice cracking, not knowing what else to say.

She stared up at him a small amount of mirth in her eyes, although she made no move to close the distance he had left between them. "Hi" she responded shyly, her voice echoing in the silent room, throat raspy from crying.

There were no words.

"I…" he started as his voice trailed off, throat hoarse. He exhaled in annoyance as he ran his hand through his hair "Of all the times I imagined this" he stated ironically "This was not how it was suppose to go"

Maggie looked up at him her voice wavering as she spoke "How was it suppose to go?" she asked unable to deal with the silence any longer, three years of silence was enough.

He moved slowly towards her halting only inches away, their eyes locking as the communication flowed silently between them. She tilted her head in silent permission, as he leaned forward, mouth stopping inches from her own. He could feel her tremble, knowing that his own hands were also shaking.

"How did you imagine it?" she repeated softly, her warm breath tickling his skin as she spoke. He leaned forward in response, brushing his lips across hers, barely a touch, testing.

It was the slightest of touches, just a whisper across her mouth, and he ran his tongue over his lip tasting the salt from the silent tear that had fallen down her cheek. He leaned back towards her, softly settling his mouth against hers as he closed his eyes, past blurring with the present. His arm snaked around her waist as she sunk against him, leaning into his warmth.

There was nothing but the moment as they crashed against each other, drinking the other in. He could taste the salt of her tears which he was certain was combining with his own as his lips dragged against hers, pulling her even closer towards him. She responded in kind, clawing at his shirt as her hands snaked up to his short hair, pulling his head towards her. Closer. Needing to be closer.

Lack of oxygen finally forced them apart as they broke their embrace. PJ took a worn breath, feeling his entire body shake as he took a few steps back from her, leaning against the wall for support. He stole a quick glance towards her as he took in her tear soaked face, chest rising and falling as she struggled to even her breathing, gasping for air. He gulped as reality suddenly crashing back onto him, the feelings from earlier reigniting, gnawing. He ventured another quick glance towards her as she eyed him timidly, watching his reaction, obviously unsure. She took a step towards him, but he shook his head reaching out a hand to stop her, his brain attempting to form words.

"Stay there" he finally managed to choke out in-between breaths "I just need a minute"

She nodded, her own breathing still haggard, her skin burning where he had touched her. For the first time however she felt a small amount of hope reignite. But she knew him, and if he was the same man, she knew he would need answers. She bit her lip as she watched him, the voice in the back of her mind reminding her that love and want was not always enough. It was his choice.

Not knowing what else to do she sat back down onto the bed, slightly surprised when PJ moved to the other side of the room, away from the door, taking up a place on the chair across from her. He shut his eyes briefly as if trying to calm himself, before turning his gaze back towards her. His defenses were up, she could tell from his eyes, and Maggie braced herself, knowing that whatever closeness she had just felt was a fading memory.

PJ could not help but stare at her as he collapsed onto the seat, trying to steel himself for what was to come. Every time he blinked he almost believed that she would vanish and this absurd dream would come to an end. The warmth of her lips on his was a reminder that this was not a dream. He took a deep breath as he contemplated the situation, the feelings of earlier continuously gnawing at him, demanding answers. He could feel her waiting for him and he had to know.

"Why?" he finally croaked, voice trembling, unable and unwilling to meet her gaze as the memories of the last three years, the memories of her death, played through his mind.

Maggie exhaled slowly at the heavily laden question, struggling for an answer, having known the question would come. Knowing that her answer could push him out the door.

"Things got…complicated" she started, needing to break away from his gaze as she spoke, fiddling with her fingers in her lap "They …ah…told me about Mick" she stated voice catching on the mention of her brother. PJ's heart instantly ached for her, but he remained silent, unable to offer any comfort as he listened, needing an answer, needing a reason for the last three years.

"They figured it out that night" she continued her voice thick with unshed emotion as she struggled to recount her final days. "They had to get me out…but they didn't know how far Mick's circle extended…which members were safe….which ones weren't…"

She took a deep breath, eyes darting to the ceiling, her voice seemingly too loud for the tension filled room. "The two that got me out, they weren't certain who to trust to get you.…send in the wrong guys and we were both dead…they couldn't guarantee that we would both get out alive…" she started, panic rising in her voice as she continued her recount "I didn't want to risk it" she whispered "I needed you to be safe…I…" she started but was cut off by PJ

"You didn't want to see me dead, so you faked your own death" he stated gruffly, anger lacing his words as he finally looked towards her.

Maggie gulped at the hostility in his tone, her heart aching as she recognized the anguish underneath "I didn't know that they were going to do that" she started but PJ was having none of it

"God what Maggie? You couldn't have found someway in those few days to tell me that you were alive!" he replied incredulously, voice rising as he stood from the chair throwing it back with force as it clanged against the table. She eyed him somewhat surprised by his outburst as he began pacing the room, fueled by his raging emotions.

"There were procedures, I couldn't have contact with anyone…" she started softly but shut up as PJ whirled around at her words, anger and hurt rushing to the surface, finally released.

"Procedures" he spat, his eyes blazing "Do you have any idea what I went through" he started, grabbing her wrist and pulling her upright, forcing her to lock eyes with him, faces inches apart "Any idea what I went through watching you die!"

He felt her fear as she stared timidly up at him, it was not physical they both knew he could never hurt her but it was emotional. Their delicate situation could be shattered with one misplaced word and they both knew it.

"No, I don't" she replied sincerely, choking back a sob. He released his grip on her and she fell against the bed, the rawness in his eyes, his pain, shocking her into silence. She watched as the colour drained from his face, noting his trembling hands as he backed away towards the door, obviously unsettled. His hand was on the door handle when her agonized voice stopped him

"PJ, please," she begged, not the least bit ashamed at the desperation in her voice, knowing that there was a chance he may not return "Please don't go" she choked, feeling the tears cascade down her face for what seemed like the hundredth time that day

He stopped, staring at her small form, his heart constricting at her pain as the tears slid down her face. He moved away from the door, his mind taking his body back to her as he found himself moving to sit beside her on the bed. She did not dare move towards him as he shifted so that he could meet her gaze, anger finally expelled to be replaced with absolute wariness.

"Have I told you how relieved I am that you're ok" he stated softly and she nodded choking back a sob. He hesitantly moved his thumb to her cheek, pausing, before silently wiping away the remnants of her tears. She automatically leaned into his touch, as he threaded his fingers through her hair, leaning in and placing a small kiss on her forehead.

The action was familiar, his touch always having soothed her, and she felt the memories invade her mind. She looked up at him, her eyes meeting his as she placed a soft kiss on his lips. The action was so familiar, so safe, that she felt her mind surrender, loosing the distinction between the present and the past. At the familiar feel of her lips against his, PJ felt his tired mind surrender to her. He shifted slightly, placing his arm on the other side of her, running small kisses along her cheek to her jaw line before capturing her lips once again. She pulled him with her as she gently leaned back upon the bed, lips interlocked as she slowly tugged at his shirt, untucking it as he continued to trail kisses along her neck. Her body trembled slightly at his touch, the familiar feeling of safety, of love, consuming her as he continued his exploration, fingers lifting at the hem of her shirt.

She almost wanted to cry as her mind suddenly triggered to where they were and she knew they had to stop. He may have been lost in the moment, in a memory, but his anguish from a few minutes prior was etched into her brain.

"PJ" she whispered as he placed another tender kiss on her lips and she shut her eyes briefly trying to will the inner strength to stop him. "PJ" she began again, with all her inner strength pushing him back from her. Having noticed her request to stop, PJ rolled off of her, hurt and confusion evident as she sat up, giving him a reassuring smile as she took his hand in hers.

"We still need to talk," she stated gently as she watched the fog lift from his eyes, reality crashing back upon him. He exhaled deeply, picking himself off the bed as he removed his hand from hers, shakily grabbing his keys from the table. She watched him silently, as he moved around the room, obviously thrown from the intensity of the moment. Wariness evident in his posture as his exhausted mind tried to divide present from past.

"You're right" he replied softly as he leaned against the wall giving her a small smile "I uh, I think I just need some time to get my head around this" he stated indicating between the two of them "And if I stay here….I…can't…" he started but Maggie nodded her understanding.

"Lunch tomorrow?" she suggested, meeting his gaze "It's public…that may be best.." she supplied and PJ nodded, the tension ran too high when they were alone.

"The restaurant downstairs is actually quite nice," she offered and he nodded his head solemnly, too tired to offer an alternative. She moved to follow him as he made his way towards the door, and he paused as his hand curved around the door handle.

"Is it safe for you?" he asked, worry evident in his tone.

She gave him a small smile as she lent tiredly against the archway "It will be fine" she assured him and he gave a brief nod.

"Goodnight Maggie" he stated softly, his hand moving slightly towards her before he retracted, instead opening the door. She bit her lip, trying not to take the action personally as he headed into the hallway.

"Goodnight PJ" she whispered as she watched him walk away before shutting the door behind her.


	4. Part 1: Chapter 4

**P****art 1: Chapter 4**

Maggie drummed her fingers against the table as she contemplated the salt and pepper shakers in front of her. Were salt grains bigger than the pepper grains, she wondered as she squinted at the containers before letting out a sigh. Who cares, she added inwardly as she glanced towards the entrance yet again before casting her eyes back to her watch. She shook her head as she realized that only forty seconds had ticked by. He was five minutes late, it felt like an eternity. Maybe, she mused to herself, because she had been ready for lunch since 9:30am this morning. Or maybe because he wasn't coming her mind added as she looked back towards the door. She shook her head trying to quell the fear rising in the pit of her stomach, PJ was always late she reasoned, briefly glancing at her watch. He would be here. She took a deep breath to clam herself, repeating the line over in her head.

PJ hurried into the foyer where the hotel's restaurant was situated, his heart beating faster in slight panic as he slowed just outside. He peered through the large glass window, noticing her in the back corner and he felt a wave of relief flow through him. She was safe. She was still there. He took a deep breath as he slowly made his way around the front entrance. She was there waiting for him, just like she had said. He paused momentarily, his hand resting on the door, readying himself for what was to come.

She felt her heart leap as she recognized his silhouette by the archway and gave him a small half-smile as he slowly made his way towards her.

"Hey" she greeted as she slid one of the menus towards him as he took his seat across from her, before giving a small nod in recognition.

"Hey" he returned softly, instantly flicking open the menu as he diverted his gaze, reading what was on offer. She bit her lip at his slight rebuff, briefly glanced down at her own menu, despite having already read it twice.

His reddened eyes told her that he had not slept last night either.

She stifled a sigh trying to quell the remorse rising. The thought that she had been selfish to come back echoed through her mind, haunting her. Clenching her jaw in silent determination she expelled the thought, even if she was selfish, the damage was done. There was no going back.

He scoured the menu intently and she could see him struggling for something to fill the heavy silence. She diverted her attention to the menu, taking the opportunity to study him, eyes traveling across his face, noting the few subtle changes in his appearance. He may have had a few extra lines and lost a couple inches of hair, but to her he was even more gorgeous than she remembered.

PJ remained silent, keeping his eye trained on his menu as he felt Maggie's gaze on him. She thought she was being discrete as she darted her gaze between him and the menu, but he had always been attuned to her. He allowed her to study him, as she had silently allowed him to the day before, understanding the need to burn the other into their memory.

"Steak sounds good" he commented, feeling the silence begin to shift to uncomfortable. The restaurant was surprisingly empty for the time of day, making their somewhat public lunch all that more intimate.

"Does sound nice" she agreed politely, re-casting her eyes towards the menu "I think I'm just going to have the grilled chicken with salad myself" she added, nervous.

"Right, do we go up and order?" he asked and Maggie shook her head in response

"Someone should be here in a minute" she replied and he nodded, finally setting the menu back down on the table.

"So…" he started, drumming his own fingers nervously against the table, obviously having come up with nothing to say.

Maggie bit her lip, this was not how she had imagined this, especially after last night. "So…" she replied, echoing his words.

PJ sighed, instantly tired of trying to dance around the issue, he had never been like that. However he wasn't certain he had the strength to start the conversation he knew they so desperately needed.

He locked eyes with her and she placed her hands on the table in preparation, giving him a slight nod. She was ready.

He took a deep breath, gathering his strength, trying to repress the intense emotion running through him. Part of him was screaming that he did not want to hear the truth, brutally aware that everything could come crashing down.

"What does this mean?" he asked charging ahead, indicating towards her.

Maggie couldn't help but frown slightly at the tone of his voice. She knew that detached tone, she had heard him use it in hundreds of interviews over the years. She took a deep breath, reminding herself that he could deal with their situation in any way he needed, but felt her brow furrow as she contemplated his question

"Which part?" she inquired needing further clarification, beginning to fidget as his eyes bore into hers.

"You" he replied, gaze not wavering "The call, you being here…what are you planning?" he asked voice strong but breath hitching on the last words.

She took a shaky breath, meeting his gaze and giving a small shrug of her shoulders "I wasn't entirely sure" she admitted honestly "Depends whether there is still a life for me here. At the very least I just wanted…." She trailed off shaking her head slightly "I don't know…it just felt right to come back…to uh…at the very least give some kind of closure…for everyone" she stated softly, studying his response. He did not give her one but gave a solemn nod of his head, his mind processing her words.

He opened his mouth to speak and Maggie cursed when their waiter chose that moment to side up to their table. They ordered quickly and the waiter gave them a friendly smile as he hurried off into the kitchen.

PJ drummed his fingers against the table, posture still rigid as he contemplated their situation.

"What do you want?" he asked, blue eyes watching her intently.

Maggie exhaled in response, running her fingers through her hair as she tried to calm her thoughts. She had to stop her mouth blurting out 'you' as she tried to express her inner turmoil. "I just wanted to give you a choice" she replied honestly, lifting her gaze to meet his "I don't expect anything from you…if you want to walk away…" her voice caught on the words and she cleared her throat "I won't stop you" she stated hoarsely, the pain associated with that thought badly hidden.

PJ rubbed his face with his hand, trying to figure out when everything got so complicated. The waiter returned with their food and he felt his stomach retract, the smell of food making him nauseous.

"I'm sorry" he stated softly, pushing the food away from him "I just…" he started but Maggie nodded her understanding, the same nauseous feeling spreading through her. However, she was beginning to think that if she left it to PJ they were never going to finish a conversation.

"PJ, we need to talk" she replied, unwilling to allow him to drag this out another day "There's never going to be a good time" she added, knowing that it was going to be painful, last night had barley been the tip of the iceberg.

He nodded solemnly in agreement. If they were ever going to have even a chance of a future, they had to talk. Had to go through it. He was silently thankful that Maggie had seemed to snap herself out of her timid haze and take control, he honestly did not have the strength for it.

"Meet me upstairs in two hours" she replied, flipping some notes onto the table to cover her meal as she rose, both needing the space before what was about to come. He nodded his acceptance as she made her way out of the restaurant.


	5. Part 1: Chapter 5

**Part 1: Chapter 5 **

Maggie shuffled in her place on the floor, getting herself comfortable while PJ gave her a small smirk before grabbing a pillow and awkwardly sitting down across from her. She waited until he was ready before placing the packet of fantails in front of them, pulling out a piece, she held it in front of her taking a deep breath

"First Question. What do you want here?" she asked, twirling the chocolate in her hand nervously.

He took a deep breath, eyes darting around the room, before settling on a spot just above her head "Honestly?" he replied and she nodded "That's how the game works" she clarified, waiting for an answer.

"I don't know if I can do this Maggie" he replied, regret in his tone "The last few days every time I think about this…I lose it" he stated biting his lip, diverting his gaze from hers.

"PJ, its going to be raw whenever we do this" she stated softly, needing to break down his defenses "In the last two days, I think we've both been…unsettled" she finished for want of a better word "But the silence is worse…if there is..." she stopped taking a deep breath "If there is anything here, we need to do this" she stated solemnly and his head snapped up at her words, meeting her gaze as he sighed nodding his head in agreement.

"I don't know what I want" he replied, exhaling slowly "I want.." he started, biting his lip as he tried to calm himself "I want you" he admitted softly, suddenly very interested with the threads of the carpet "But I don't know…..I can't just erase the past three years" he stated softly, glancing up towards her.

She nodded in response, as she tossed him the chocolate which he caught, the crinkling of the paper echoing in the room. Maggie processed his words, running them through her mind, he wanted her, her heart almost sang. But she was also painfully aware of the condition attached to those words.

He took a fantail out of the packet, eyes locking.

"Did you make a new life?" he asked, eyes searching hers.

She gave a small nod "Not in the same way" she replied and he titled his head in response, waiting for her to elaborate "I had a house, a few good friends…but it wasn't…." she sighed, trying to form words "Not being able to let them know who I really was, it puts up…barriers, they couldn't really know me in the same way. It didn't fit" she replied softly, trying to explain but he gave a small nod showing that he understood as he tossed her the chocolate.

She popped the chocolate in her mouth, needing a break from the heavily laden conversation, she felt her mind wonder back to the others she had left behind.

"The others in Mt Thomas" she stated giving him a small smile "How are they?" she asked hopefully, hoping that the last three years had treated them kind.

"They're good," he confirmed and Maggie felt a wave of relief rush through her. "Boss, Ben and Jack are all still at the station" he confirmed "Jo actually headed off to Sydney not long after you…" he stated, swallowing the lump that formed in his throat "Left" he croaked, and Maggie diverted her eyes, hearing the pain in his voice. "Ah…but Dash is actually back…guess you can't take the country out of the girl" he tried, his lighthearted comment somewhat out of place "And then there's Tess" he added, "She uh came not long after"

Maggie nodded in response, flicking him the chocolate, guilt eating at her inside. PJ bit his lip, eyes moist as he looked towards her and she steeled herself, knowing that this was going to hurt.

"How could you not have called?" he choked, his emotions overcoming him briefly. She wanted to reach out and comfort him, but knew that it was too early. He diverted his gaze trying to calm himself and she took a deep breath knowing he was waiting for an answer.

"I…" she started, her own voice cracking as she struggled to come up with a reason "I should have" she relented quietly, heart tearing at the signs of his distress, knowing it was merely a glimpse of what he would have gone through. "At first, there really was no time, it was too dangerous…those first few weeks…" she tried, trailing off at her own memories of those few weeks after she had been ripped from everything she knew. She took a breath to calm herself before continuing, "A few months passed before they managed to relocate me and build a life, a back story." She started "I didn't call you then because by that time I…it seemed too late. If you were moving on, I didn't want to disrupt it….I never thought I would be able to come back…I knew that if you thought I was gone, that you could let me go, have all those things that we couldn't have" she stated voice cracking, tears beginning to spill

He looked up at her then, anger still bubbling beneath the surface "I told you before everything" he started, voice wavering slightly "Before I was going with you, when everything started. I told you I didn't want to think of you as a distant memory. That I wanted to think of you having a family and kids. You knew that, you should have told me" he replied with conviction, hurt evident.

She nodded solemnly, biting her lip "I know" she started, meeting his eyes for the first time "I know that's what you told me but I kept thinking what if our roles were reversed-" she started and PJ cut her off

"If our roles were reversed" he stated, slight venom creeping into his voice "Then you would know how important it would have been to tell me" he asserted, blue eyes hard as ice.

"PJ" she started but he shook his head glaring at her "You made me think you were dead!" he stated, the anger breaking against the tide of anguish in his voice. "You made me sit through your funeral, hold your body in my arms…god not even your body" he added as the reality of the situation began to take hold. "I mourned for you…do you know what it's like…the numbness, the isolation…the…" he started but was cut off by Maggie's own voice.

"YES" she spat, her outburst silencing him momentarily allowing her to speak "To be isolated, to have no meaning, no purpose…to watch everything you've hoped for, dreamt for just slip away. Yes I have some idea what that's like" she spat back at him, her repressed pain finally surging to the surface "I may not have buried you PJ, but I lost you for what I thought was the rest of my life. The difference is that I had no closure. You say that its worse having just a memory, that you would have been ok knowing that I was, and you can sit there and honestly believe that." She stated, tired of holding back "Maybe what you went through was more intense, more consuming but it had an end PJ. Looking over your shoulder and seeing your face in almost every man in the street thinking 'Maybe he found me', that's not pain free either" she finished, glaring at him "I didn't want you looking over your shoulder for the next twenty years wondering if perhaps I had come back, was that blonde in the street me or whatever" she finished her arms punching the air to emphasize her point "You had already buried me, already began to mourn me, I couldn't undo the damage already done and I was not going to add to it and if I got it wrong, well I'm sorry" she relented slightly "But I didn't do it to hurt you"

PJ just stared at her, as he watched her crumple back into her seating position, the fight draining out of her. She looked slightly horrified at her outburst as she refused to meet his gaze, eyes shielded in the palm of her hand as she tried to calm her breathing. He watched her and for the first time realized that he had not been the only one to mourn. They had mourned each other, their future and their dreams, separately and alone. He shuffled over to her side, closing the distance between them and he gave her a reassuring smile at her questioning gaze. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and she fell into his embrace, resting her head on his shoulder as stroked his fingers soothing along her hair. His other hand moved in front of her, holding out the chocolate and he felt her small chuckle as she reached out for it, fingers brushing his, lingering slightly before unwrapping and placing the chocolate in her mouth.

"Have you moved on?" she asked tentatively, scared of the answer but knowing it needed to be addressed.

"No" he replied softly, continuing to stroke her hair "I've never wanted a life with anyone else" he admitted softly as he reached over with his free hand and took a chocolate from the packet.

"Have you?" he asked, fingers pausing as he awaited her answer.

"No" she replied softly, her breath warm against his ear as she reached out taking another chocolate.

He shifted slightly to meet her gaze and she lifted her head in response, they were inches apart as he reached one hand up tracing the curves of her face and she allowed her eyes to briefly flutter close, revealing in his gentle touch.

"You're here right?" he asked, voice hoarse, barely above a whisper and she locked eyes with him, moving her hand to cover his "I'm here" she confirmed as he moved towards her, resting his forehead against hers, reconnecting. He entwined his fingers through hers and she nuzzled his cheek, providing the comfort he needed. She allowed him to take control as he placed a small kiss on her forehead, before gently placing his lips against hers. The kiss was slow and gentle, filled with longing and warmth as she melted into him, allowing the urge to be indulged. He pulled back from the kiss, his eyes flicking open to meet with hers.

"I love you," he admitted softly and she felt the tears fall, relief flooding through her "I love you too" she choked, as he kissed her tears away.

"We need more time" he stated softly "Three years can't be undone in a night…there are things…" he stated and Maggie nodded slightly in acknowledgment, forehead still resting against his "I know" she whispered. "There is a lot we have to rebuild"

He broke apart from her slightly, tilting her face up towards him "For tonight," he started, eyes meeting hers "Can we just…"

Maggie managed a brief nod in agreement before she felt him pull her closer, his mouth hungrily seeking out hers. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she allowed him to lift her, her small frame engulfed in his arms as he moved them from the position on the floor, and she drew him down with her as he laid her upon the bed. He captured her mouth in a fiery kiss, hands roaming freely over her body, remembering, possessing. He had pinned her underneath him and she revealed in the feel of his body, as she raked her hands across his back, slipping her hands under the material, his skin burning at her touch.

The world fell away as they allowed their passion to consume them, allowed their bodies and their soles to reconnect.

**End Part 1.**


	6. Part 2: Chapter 1

**Author's Note**: Sorry should have clarified this better - The story is broken up into parts, for the reason to signify a next phase in time. Kind of like a sequel but it's not able to stand alone. So in this case (although it will become apparent) takes place 3 weeks after the end of Part 1.

**Part 2: Chapter 1**

Maggie stood silently, wrapping her arms around herself as the cold breeze hit against her, tossing her hair into her eyes. It was late, the police sign no longer illuminated, communicating that the station was locked and closed for the night. She stood there, staring, taking in every brick, every feature. It looked the same as it had all those years, as if stuck in a time warp, untouched. She revealed in the familiar crunch of gravel under her feet as she traced her fingers along the cold brick, as if the building could transfer her back to when everything was simpler, to who she use to be.

"Can I help you?" a familiar voice called behind her and she felt her entire body freeze, her mind knowing the voice anywhere. She felt the panic rise into her chest, as her heart constricted, unsure of what to do.

She could hear the gravel crunch as he closed the distance and she took a deep breath as she slowly turned, timidly meeting his gaze as she offered him a meek smile

"Hi, Boss" she stated, voice trembling slightly, watching his reaction.

She saw his eyes widen in realization and was shocked as she instantly felt his warm arms engulf her and she snaked her arms around him, the tears pricking at her eyes before spilling over as she let out a small sob of relief.

He pulled back from her slightly, hands still resting on her arms as he took in her appearance and she gave him a small smile in return.

"I still can't believe it" he whispered softly and she managed a small nod as she composed herself "Yeah I've been getting that lately" she replied, letting out a small shaky laugh and he gave her a smile, indicating with his head to the door

"Let's get you inside, it's freezing out here," he instructed as he broke apart from her fiddling with his keys as he opened the station door. Maggie felt a small smile tug at the edge of her mouth at the familiar creak, the door hinge still needing oiling.

She followed him through the station, shutting the door firmly behind her as she followed him into his office, taking the familiar seat across from his desk. The sense of déjà vu overwhelmed her, memories of sitting in his office, in this chair, invaded her mind and she choked back a sob as she allowed her eyes to scan the room. Tom noticed her distress and gave her a small reassuring smile as he leaned forward, meeting her gaze.

"How are you holding up?" he asked as he watched the emotions play across her face.

She gave him a shaky smile "I'm ok…it's just all…" she started but trailed off as she tried to put the emotions into words.

"Overwhelming" he supplied knowingly and Maggie looked up at him surprised before giving a small nod "I didn't think just being here, just seeing the town, the places…would be like this" she responded and he gave a brief nod in understanding.

"Boss" she started but paused as if unsure.

He sat there, giving her a reassuring nod as he waited for her to continue. She bit her lip nervously and he could see the anxiousness on her face, he had no doubt what her next question would be regarding.

"How has he been?" she asked softly and he stared at her slightly surprised by her question "You haven't seen him already?" he asked softly and Maggie shook her head as she fiddled with her hands in her lap "I literally just got into town, I was passing the station and I had to stop" she admitted glancing up at him "But he's been ok?" she asked hopefully, meeting his gaze.

"You know PJ" the Boss stated with a small sigh "Not exactly one to wear his heart on his sleeve. He's been…closed about the issue" he stated although wanting to pacify her "He told us witness had contacted him, that you were alive and that he had seen you that weekend. He said that you would be here in about two weeks once a few things had been cleared and that quite frankly that was the beginning and end." he replied "I don't think he was ready to talk"

Maggie nodded solemnly, not surprised in the slightest that he had chosen to play the situation close to his chest, although a little alarmed he had not even shared his concerns with the Boss. She shook her head trying to clear it as she turned her full attention back to the man in front of her

"Enough about me, how have you been?" she asked genuinely interested in the answer and he felt himself grin at her typical behavior.

"I've been well" he replied before giving her a knowing look "Go see him Doyle" he replied.

Maggie felt the emotion swell at hearing her last name, and opened her mouth to protest before he cut her off

"We'll have plenty of time" he stated reassuringly "Go"

She rose hesitantly casting one last look at him as she moved towards him, wrapping her small arms around him "I've missed you" she replied honestly and he patted her reassuringly as she pulled back "I've missed you too"

She gave him a small smile over her shoulder as she closed his office door behind her, glancing around the darkened main area before making her way towards the door.


	7. Part 2: Chapter 2

**Author's Note**: Sorry should have clarified this better - The story is broken up into parts, for the reason to signify a next phase in time. Kind of like a sequel but it's not able to stand alone. So in this case (although it will become apparent) takes place 3 weeks after the end of Part 1.

Further, this is the last of the chapters I had planned when I began, so I have to determine where I want to take this and for how long. If you're reading and want this developed further then please review and let me know, as at the moment anything can happen ;)

**Part 2: Chapter 2**

She parked across the road, before hesitantly making her way up the driveway to the front door, the memories encompassing her in waves. Pausing, she bit her lip nervously as she reached up, pressing the doorbell, the chiming echoing throughout the house. With their roles reversed, she was starting to wonder how PJ had ever had the strength to even knock on her hotel door. She waited a few moments hearing the shuffling from inside and she hoped he hadn't moved in the last three years. No she reassured herself, surely he would have told her.

The creak of the door opening startled her from her thoughts as her eyes instantly met intense blue. He moved aside silently as he allowed her to enter his home before locking the door securely behind them. Her eyes scanned over his ruffled appearance and his attire and she cursed inwardly as she realized he had been asleep.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake-" she started but was silenced by his lips against her cheek, a soft touch before pulling back, meeting her surprised but giddy gaze "Don't be sorry" he stated, voice gruff from sleep. She gave a small nod as he placed his hand on the small of her back leading her towards the couch before taking the seat across from her.

"Hey" he greeted, giving her a small smile.

"Hi" she replied slightly nervous "I'm here," giving him a small smile in return.

"Long term?" he asked, eying her, waiting.

"I've tied up everything I needed to with witness…there's still some stuff but that can be done from here" she confirmed, fiddling with the cushion within her grasp.

He nodded in response, his mind running through their situation as he struggled to determine their next move. "Do you have a place to stay tonight?" he asked softly, looking towards her.

"Uh no, I didn't book that far ahead and it took longer than I thought to get here" she admitted shakily as she diverted her gaze around the room, which only caused another barrage of memories to filter through her mind.

PJ watched her silently, concerned with her apparent unease in his home as he watched the assortment of emotions cross her features, despite her attempts to hide it. He waited until she looked back towards him before rising and moving beside her, she seemed somewhat startled by his presence as he placed a reassuring hand over hers.

"What's going on" he demanded softly, reaching up to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear, trying to reassure her. She melted into his touch as he had hoped she would, her head resting wearily against his hand.

"I want to be here PJ" she whispered softly, looking up towards him and he gave her a small smile as he watched her desperately try to reassure him that she wasn't going to vanish.

"I believe you" he replied honestly and she looked up at him, relief apparent in her stormy eyes "But that's not what I asked" he prodded.

"I've just" she started before trailing off "PJ its all insignificant…" she started but he shook his head meeting her gaze "Trust me" he whispered softly and she felt the first warm tear trickle down her cheek.

"It's just a bit overwhelming" she admitted softly, meeting his gaze "I'm happy but there are just so many memories…." She stated as she choked back a sob "I didn't think I would see any of these places again and I'm here and everything is just…." She trailed off and was surprised for the second time that night when she felt a strong set of arms wrap around her. She closed her eyes nuzzling into the crook of his neck, drawing from his strength. He ran his fingers down her hair soothingly and she sunk into him, letting him support her. They stayed intertwined for a few minutes, before she pulled back slightly, clearing her throat as she composed herself

"Uh I'm sor-" she started but cut herself off at PJ's pointed look "Thank you" she finished as she shuffled on the couch, her knee resting against his comfortably.

He gave her a small smile as he lent back against the couch, allowing the tension from earlier to dissipate. She felt herself let out a calming breath, feeling more at ease as she watched him relax, knee knocking against his.

"You're staying here tonight" he stated adamantly and Maggie just gave a small nod, unwilling to argue with him, happy to have been invited.

"I uh haven't heard from you since that morning…" he stated and she bit her lip to keep from smiling as she watched a small blush tinge his skin. She smiled at the memory of their one night together and gave a brief nod in recognition "Witness took longer than I thought to give the all clear for me to come back"

"It's been almost three weeks…I was starting to get a bit worried," he admitted softly.

"If I had a say it would have been less than a day" she replied, giving him a small knowing smile.

He felt the small grin spread across his face, silently pleased that they were comfortable enough with each other for their regular banter to return. She gave him a small smile back, the electricity sparking between them.

"Hmmm" he replied, as he reached up to rub his neck, suddenly feeling quite warm in the room. Maggie watched him with a small twinkle in her eye as she too leaned back onto the couch, rolling her shoulders to ease her aching muscles.

He watched her, indicating to a small pile of linen in the corner of the room that she had not noticed when she had walked in. "If you're tired, everything is ready" he stated and she gave a brief nod, knowing that it was way too early for them to be sharing a bed.

"I'll book a room with Chris tomorrow" she stated softly, too content to move.

"You don't have to hurry" he replied and she shook her head reluctantly "I should" she stated unenthusiastically and he gave a solemn nod. She should, didn't mean that either of them wanted her to.

"So you said everything with witness was complete?" he asked again, his mind drudging through the facts. Maggie gave a brief nod as she yawned, unable to hide her weariness.

"So your other life…" he prompted, meeting her gaze, voice shaky in spite of himself.

"Over" she confirmed as she stretched before settling herself back down on the couch.

"To say goodbye, must have been hard" he stated, her new life having played on his mind while they had been apart.

"Yes" she admitted softly a small amount of sadness in her eyes "They were good people, but I prefer to look at what I'm gaining" she stated, meeting his gaze letting her words permeate the air.

"Did you tell them about…Mt Thomas?" he asked, indicating around him and she gave a small shake of her head "I couldn't tell them, they think I took a very good job opportunity" she replied, diverting her gaze from his as she calmed herself, unwilling to think of those she had now left behind.

"You really miss them" he stated slightly surprised in spite of himself, it had never occurred to him that she would be leaving behind people of significance to her when she had decided to come home.

"It's not the same as this" she stated as if reading his thoughts, feeling slightly off balance talking about her other life "But when I was relocated I never thought could belong anywhere else, would want to belong anywhere…some days their support was all that was holding me together, without you and Dad, without my job…I was a little lost" she admitted softly, unwilling to meet his gaze "They made me feel like part of me was still Maggie Doyle"

"I'm glad" he stated softly, sitting up and placing a comforting hand on her knee. She looked up at him surprised as he met her gaze "I'm glad you had someone looking after you" he admitted, although she did not miss the slight tinge of jealousy in his tone. She understood, they were supposed to have been there for each other.

She moved closer to him, grazing her fingers softly across his cheek "You mean the world to me" she whispered softly and he locked eyes with her as he slowly moved forward, capturing her mouth in a slow sensual kiss. The kiss seemed to last forever, as his warmth surrounded her, protecting her. He drew back, both breathing heavily as he leaned his forehead against hers. They stayed like that for a few moments, content, before she slowly pulled away meeting his gaze.

"I should get ready for bed" she stated, knowing she needed to break away from him if she was going to retain any sense of self control. He gave a slight nod as if reading her thoughts, finding himself in a similar predicament. His mind was telling him to move off the couch but his body remained as his fingers trailed along her side, her body instantly reacting to his touch.

"PJ" she breathed somewhat heavily and he felt himself leaning in and placing a small peck on her lips without even realizing it, his body on auto as he trailed kisses along her jaw line. She felt the fight drain from her body as his lips brushed her skin, surrendering to him as she brought her lips down to meet his, interlocking in another gentle kiss.

The sudden shrill of the phone jolted them apart.

He looked up at her surprised, as he rose to pick up the offending object, obviously disorientated from their tryst.

"Hello" he stated voice gruff as he greeted the caller.

Maggie took the opportunity to compose herself, attempting to steady her breathing as her mind reeled at what had just occurred. They had agreed the morning after their talk that they were to take this slow. That they both needed time to come to grips with the last three years and things couldn't and shouldn't just pick up where they had left off. Unfortunately the mature and proper thing to do seemed to go straight out the window whenever they were less than three feet from each other. She stifled a sigh as she moved off the couch towards the corner where the linen was stored, there was definitely no way they were sharing a bed.

She heard the phone click off and she turned as PJ made his way back towards her, remorse evident on his features "I shouldn't of put you in that position. I'm sor-" he started but she shook her head placing her finger against her lips to shush him. "Don't be sorry" she replied softly, repeating his words from earlier. He gave a brief nod as he indicated to the phone, letting the subject drop at her apparent ease "That was Tess, I have to head into work, CI matter" he informed her giving her a small smile "Will you be ok here?" he asked and she felt a small smirk lift at the corner of her mouth "I've navigated my way around here a few times, I think I can remember where everything is" she responded, teasing him slightly and he gave a nod, realizing he should have seen it coming.

"Goodnight Mags" he stated softly reaching over to give her a small peck on the cheek, before heading into his bedroom to ready himself for the long night ahead.


	8. Part 2: Chapter 3

**Author's Note:** As promised. Will now be updating more regularly

**Part 2: Chapter 3**

PJ drummed his finger impatiently against the bar as his eyes scoured the foyer of the Imperial Hotel, wishing the object of his thoughts would just appear in front of him.

"You alright there Peej?" Chris asked from the counter. His head jerked up in surprise at her voice, having been lost in thought.

"Just thinking," he murmured and Chris gave him a knowing smile "May I hesitate a guess about whom?" she asked, an edge of teasing in her voice. He gave her a pointed look, but sighed in defeat. There was no denying it.

"I've missed her alright," he admitted softly as he took another sip of his drink.

Chris gave a small nod "I know you have," she stated, leaning against the bar "Where is she tonight?"

"Over at Dash's with Tess, Zoe's down from Melbourne…some girl bonding…thing" he stated motioning with his hand in an attempt to fill the gaps.

"No men allowed heh" she commented and he gave a small nod.

"I know it's selfish Chrissy" he started as he traced the rim of the glass with his finger "I mean she's missed everybody and it affected everyone when she left but..." he stated, pausing as if debating whether to share his thoughts.

"You don't want to share" she finished knowingly and he looked up at her surprised, not needing to confirm her assertion.

"How pathetic is that?" he asked as he finished the beer, slamming the glass back down on the bench.

"It's understandable" she replied "But the novelty will where off for most in a few weeks. Once she settled in, everything will be back to normal, everybody is just caught up at the moment," she explained and he gave a slight 'huff' in response, as he grabbed his jacket.

"I better head off, thanks for the beer" he commented but she called out to him and he turned to face her, waiting for her to speak.

"Just try to arrange a dinner or something, she's probably feeling it too" she commented and he gave her a brief nod as he headed out of the bustling pub, towards home.

He exhaled tiredly as he unlocked his front door, throwing his keys on the bench as he headed into the kitchen. Grabbing a packet of nuts from the cupboard, PJ made his way back into the lounge. He knew he would be unable to sleep, too many thoughts of a certain someone occupying his mind. His solitude was interrupted, however, at the irritating echo of the doorbell.

"Alright" PJ remarked as he trudged towards the door, the grating echo of the doorbell persistently ringing through the house. He swung open the door intending to bark but instead felt himself break into a grin at the familiar face.

"Hey mate" Nick greeted casually holding up a six-pack of beer "Can I come in?"

PJ stepped aside dumbfound as Nick entered his home, shutting the door behind him.

"What are you doing in town?" PJ asked, giving Nick a friendly slap on the back as he followed him, plonking themselves onto the couch. Nick placed the beer on the table, breaking one off and throwing it at PJ.

"Came to pick up Zoe, thought it was about time for a visit" he replied as he unscrewed his own beer, taking a large gulp.

PJ pulled the tab of his own before eyeing Nick curiously "Not checking up on me are you?" he asked, settling himself back on the couch

"Nah" he replied, lie obvious, as he shuffled in his spot trying to get comfortable "Heard about Maggie though, quite a shock" he commented, no expression upon his face.

PJ just gave a nod, unsure if he was ready to broach the Maggie Doyle subject. Nick, however, was nothing if not direct.

"You dealing?" he asked, as he rose, grabbing the bowl of nuts PJ had left on the table.

"I'm glad she's back" he commented, unsure if he was ready to talk

"Not what I asked" Nick replied, popping the nuts into his mouth "Zoe mentioned that the two of you aren't together" he probed, knowing that he needed to talk

"We are" He replied automatically "Kind of, we're just taking things slow….there's nothing wrong with that" he stated, diverting his gaze from Nick and flicking on the TV, hoping to end the conversation.

Nick merely raised his voice "Except when you've known her for over ten years and have previously been engaged" he pointed out, his voice rising on par with the TV "Come on mate" he added and PJ sighed as he flicked the TV onto mute

The room was silent

"Look" Nick started, taking a deep breath

"Don't," he replied, his eyes glaring a warning before turning away, his emotional turmoil evident. He took a swig of beer, letting the alcohol sooth his nerves "It's complicated…" he started but stopped at Nick's voice.

"You're making it that way," he asserted, and PJ felt his anger rise at his statement

"No" he responded angrily, the last week's frustrations finally being released "You don't just get to rock in here and make some kind of judgment" he stated, voice rising in volume "You have no idea what it has been like!"

Nick sat there passively, waiting for PJ to finish his outburst. "Feel better?" he asked, taking a sip of beer.

"No" he responded hotly before taking a deep breath "Yes" he admitted turning back to Nick.

He waited until PJ caught his eye before continuing, "Mate, I can relate," he stated, raising his hand to silence PJ's outburst. "I lost my family," he reminded, his voice catching, even after so much time. PJ's eyes softened in recognition, his silence allowing Nick to continue.

"If Jenny…" he began, voice hitching on the name of his previous wife "If she was alive today, if I didn't have Zoe…there would be nothing that would keep me away" he stated and he gave a small resigned sigh

"Even if you lost her again?" PJ asked, voice cracking slightly

Nick looked up at him, catching his eye as he spoke "I had to when I married Zoe…had to live with the idea that I could lose another wife…go through it all again" he started "But…It's worth it. I get it mate, but to you honestly think you're going to be less affected?" he inquired, knowing the answer.

PJ gave a small shake of his head "She's not the same though" he commented, tapping his fingers against the beer can "I'm not the same….we've been apart so long"

"It's just time. Which is getting longer everyday you sit there" Nick commented, refusing to accept PJ's excuse.

"I wonder about it," he stated, taking another sip, needing to feel the alcohol "About her life, what she did, who she was…the name she took" he rambled, lost in his thoughts.

"Well you're not going to get those answers from me" Nick stated jokingly "Now say you'll talk to Maggie, so I can get Zoe off my back," he stated jokingly, although there was a ring of truth to it.

"So the ulterior motive comes out" PJ replied, relaxing slightly as the conversation became more lighthearted.

"Please all I have heard for two days is 'Talk to PJ'" he stated in a mocking tone, taking another quick swig of beer "So do a man a favor" he stated, shooting him a pleading look

"I'll do something," he stated, not willing to offer more, Nick knowing not to push. Instead he reached over, flicking the volume back up "No way the cats are going to lose" he stated as he diverted his attention to the football game.

PJ gave a grunt in response, before diverting his attention to the TV, smirking as the lions scored yet another goal.


	9. Part 2: Chapter 4

**Part 2: Chapter 4**

PJ could not help the small smile that tugged on his lips as he felt Maggie subconsciously snuggle into his side as the movie continued to play. He had invited her over for dinner, Nick's words repeating over in his head. He knew they had to talk but dinner had turned out quite enjoyable, the conversation flowing freely, and he had not had the heart to ruin the easy banter. Thus, he had suggested a movie to stop her heading home. However, as the piles of paperwork upon his desk illustrated, he was a master at procrastination.

Maggie shuffled slightly on the couch as she continued to watch the movie play out across the screen not caring how Bruce Willis would manage to get out of his current scrape. She had decided not to enlighten him that she had seen this movie. Every movie actually that had featured the man, having developed a fondness of them during her absence.

He reached his hand over to her lap, stealing another chocolate from the packet, his attention focused on the action sequence playing out. She stifled a yawn as she diverted her eyes to the room, her mind wandering, curious to when PJ had changed the curtains.

She felt him move underneath her jostling her and she groaned as her eyes flicked open. She paused. When had her eyes been closed? She looked groggily up at PJ, his eyes sparkling with amusement at her perplexed look.

"You fell asleep," he offered, shuffling as she swung her legs to sit upright.

"Sorry," she mumbled, rubbing her tired eyes with the back of her hand "What time is it?"

"Eight-thirty, you were out for the last hour," he supplied a small smirk on his face.

"Aww," Maggie groaned tiredly "You mean I missed the one good part of that stupid movie," she stated, disappointed.

PJ frowned in repose giving her a curious look "You've seen the movie before?" he enquired and she stilled for a second, realizing her slip.

"Yeah," she admitted softly, turning to face him properly on the couch.

"You hate Bruce Willis," he stated surprised, he had always use to battle with her for a Bruce Willis movie to even enter the house.

"I did, I do," she admitted before sighing, "They reminded me of you," she supplied, breaking her gaze slightly embarrassed. He eyed her as if trying to read her thoughts. The silence in the room lingered and she felt her breath hitch as his blue eyes grew more intense. He moved his hand towards her, caressing her cheek with his fingers as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

She met his eyes, the intensity igniting between him as his fingers remained against her cheek. She felt herself lean into his touch, his hand cupping her face. He move forward, capturing her mouth as his self-control crushed under the tide of emotion. It was just a whisper of a touch against her lips and he felt her tremble as she laced a hand around his neck, pulling him back to her as their lips met in a slow sensual kiss. He heard her whimper against his mouth as she deepened the kiss and he encircled her waist, pulling her gently against him.

Gasping for air, he reluctantly broke away from her, resting his forehead against hers, their erratic breathing the only sound to be heard. Maggie swallowed, trying to clear her throat as she struggled to speak.

"Wow," she whispered, her voice husky as she tried to regain control "Unexpected," she managed, as PJ remained silent, his heart pounding. Nick's word echoed in his mind. This was not fair to her, he berated himself as he glanced into her eyes, he could not leave things the way they were. He had to do this now.

He pulled back from her, tilting her chin with his hand to meet her gaze "I need to talk with you," he admitted softly but before she could speak, he continued, "I love you, I want you to know that."

She gulped slightly at the intensity in his eyes but gave a brief nod "I love you too," she replied, refusing to break eye contact. He moved his hand to capture hers, watching the uncertainty flitter through her eyes and he felt the guilt stab at him.

"When I went back to your hotel room that night," he stated, his voice hitching slightly at the mention of their one night together "I needed to be with you. To know that it was real. To know you had come home." He stated, trying to articulate his thoughts. Maggie sat there, processing every word, trying to understand.

"And all I have wanted to do since you came back is take you to bed and pick up exactly where we left off," he added softly, slightly bashful at his admission.

"Then why?" she interrupted, trying to steady her own emotions "Why didn't you want me here with you? Why the space?" she asked, fighting against the tears that threatened to spill, her own emotions from the past couple of weeks no longer able to be suppressed.

"I use to dream that I saved you," he admitted softly, trying to answer her "But every time I ended back at those rail yards…" he started, his voice breaking.

"I thought we had worked through that…why I left, what happened," she replied softly, trying to understand his hesitance over the past weeks.

"We did, that's not it," he replied, fidgeting slightly "What haunts me now is the prospect of losing you again," he admitted, voice thick with unshed emotion "Because I am so scared that it's not over,"

"PJ…" she began but he shook his head needing to speak.

"I believe in us," he admitted, "I believe that we love each other enough to make this work." He took a deep breath "But I'm scared of loose ends, I'm scared that someone will recognize you…those wheels you set in motion when you saw Barry Craig…that network is extensive…I know because I spent months searching through it trying to find out who kil-" he stopped, unable to form the words. "I worry that one day the allure of finding those answers will draw you back in and I worry if you'll ever be truly ok with not knowing…not putting Robbie and everything related to rest."

He diverted his gaze from hers, the silence permeating the air. She leaned over placing a soft hand on his arm to gain his attention "Can I speak now?" she asked and he gave a small nod, indicating that he was listening but unable to meet her gaze.

"I have the same fear," she admitted softly "You know as well as I do that people aren't suppose to come back from witness protection. I worry that the attention from the town may make me a target and I worry that witness was wrong when they claimed I was no longer under threat. I can't sit here and tell you that things are ok because I don't know that they will be" she stated "And despite everything I loved my family, but I have come to terms with the fact that I will never be able to understand what happened to them. I can promise you one thing," she stated, waiting until he finally looked up at her before continuing, "I do not want and will have no part in that drug syndicate."

His eyes locked on hers as he reached up cupping her face, bringing her closer as he captured her mouth in a gentle kiss. He wrapped his arms around her, drawing her into his embrace and she hugged him back just as tightly. They did not say anything. There was no need, as they took comfort in the mere presence of each other before drawing back.

"Okay," he stated simply, taking a deep breath his hands resting gently upon hers.

Her breath hitched at his words, unsure as she met his gaze, eyes pleading for an explanation.

"I trust you," he stated, giving a small nod of his head "I don't want to go backwards," he admitted softly.

"What do you want?" she replied "PJ, you insisted on space and now…" she trailed off, not wanting to get too hopeful "You're not being fair," she stated adamantly, finally tired of their over complicated relationship.

He gave a deep sigh, letting his mind mull over the truth of her words "After you…I always said if I had just had one more day," he stated, voice catching slightly "These last few weeks was not how I would have spent it."

She gave a small nod as she waited for him to continue, waiting, hoping.

"If you meant what you said-" he started but was interrupted by Maggie's curt "I did"

"Then I have to trust that," he admitted softly "And that has to be the end of it."

"The end of it," she repeated softly, not quite comprehending his words, eyes searching for reassurance.

He felt his heart constrict as he watched the slight panic cross her features as her mind tried to process what exactly he was ending. He shuffled closer to her, placing a reassuring hand on her arm "I want to re-build our lives here," he stated softly barely above a whisper. She prayed that she had heard him correctly. That he wanted her. A life with her.

He looked up, for the first time since the beginning, knowing exactly what he wanted "I love you," he started as he slowly closed the distance between them, a coy smile on his face "I don't just want to be your friend."

She felt the relief flood her body as the smile split her face. She reached out for his hands, before meeting his shinning eyes "So…" she asked, needing to hear the words

"I want to be with you," he stated, feeling relieved to finally be able to say the words. To take that leap again.

"This is it," she clarified, allowing him to pull her closer, encircling his arms around her waist "No more maybes, no more waiting…just the two of us?" she asked needing to be certain that he could put everything behind them "No more pushing away," she added, eyes hardening slightly in a silent warning.

"This is it, if you want it to be," he confirmed, unable to stop the grin tugging at his lips. She exhaled deeply as she closed the remaining space between them, meeting his lips in a loving kiss.

"Was that a yes?" he mumbled, nuzzling his face against hers. She remained silent, until he looked back up at her "Yes," she whispered softly

He moved in to kiss her but she pulled back keeping the distance between them. He stopped, giving her a questioning look and she grinned in response, placing a soft peck on his cheek before rising from the couch.

PJ stared at her dumfounded as she grabbed the keys of her rental car from the table, giving him a small smile "I'll meet you for breakfast tomorrow morning at the Imperial," she stated, heading towards the door. She was stopped, however, when PJ finally got his head into gear, his arm acting as a barricade between her and the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked surprised, as he used his body to block her up against the wall, pinning her between his arms. She knew that if she attempted to move that he would let her but she stayed still, a small twinkle in her eye.

"Cooling off period," she responded casually and she stifled a small giggle when she saw his eyebrows arch in surprise "Thinking of backing out already?" he asked jokingly, although somewhat nervous.

"No," she responded honestly, casting him an assuring glance "But I think enough big decisions have been made for tonight, it's safer if I leave…see if everything is the same in the morning" she added, shuffling slightly

"It will be," he stated adamantly, meeting her eyes "And safer if you leave?" he queried giving her a knowing grin "What exactly do you think is going to happen?" he asked waggling his eyebrow suggestively.

Maggie let out a burst of laughter at his antics, the atmosphere returning to the lightheartedness of earlier. "Nothing," she replied with a small smirk "Because I'm leaving," she added, ducking out from underneath his arm.

He gave her a small nod in understanding as he followed her out "Tomorrow, breakfast," he repeated and she gave a nod "I'll see you at seven thirty," she commented opening the door, but was stopped at his hand on her wrist

"When you say seven you mean nine right?" he asked and she gave a small shake of her head "No, I meant seven" she replied giving him a grin. "Just think that with all the extra sleep you'll get tonight, it will seem like nine when you wake up," she responded coyly as she gave him a quick peck on the cheek before heading out into the night.


	10. Part 2: Chapter 5

**Author's Note**: For the first time I have been struggling with the planning of where exactly this piece will go, and while I have a couple of prolific readers (which I thank - greatly appreciated), I'm not 100% sure about the continuation. I have a few more chapters in the process of becoming actual chapters but I'm not sure if this piece will eventuate much further. I'm undecided ;) I will of course leave you with an end whether I finish in the next few chapters or not.

**Part 2: Chapter 5**

Maggie flicked through the channels of her TV later that night, exhausted but unable to sleep. She stole another look at the clock by her bedside and let out a huff of frustration as 12:01 stared back at her in angry red letters. It was official, time had actually grind to a halt. She threw down her remote in frustration and berated herself for the hundredth time.

"What was I thinking?" she muttered into the darkness, "Great idea this cooling off period," she added bitterly, running her hands across her face. Only seven hours and twenty-nine minutes left.

Her head shot up when she heard a soft tapping on her door, her heart instantly pounding. Creeping slowly towards the door, she peered through the peephole and heaved a sigh of relief at the figure standing before her.

PJ gave her a small smile as she unlocked the door, motioning for him to come in as she reset the locks behind them before flicking on the light.

"What are you-" she started but was cut off by a brief peck on the lips from PJ as he moved past her, settling himself on her bed. She stared as he suddenly placed a plastic bag beside him, indicating for her to sit.

"Morning," he greeted cheerfully but Maggie stood in place, staring at him as if he were an idiot.

"Morning," she responded automatically before adding, "What are you doing here?"

He gave her a sheepish smile before giving a small shrug of his shoulders. "Well uh I spent the first two hours after you left, tossing and turning, and then half an hour watching really bad TV," he stated as she slowly walked over, taking a place beside him on the bed. "So I gave up on sleep, and thought I would take you up on breakfast, since it's morning," he answered motioning to her clock, which now read 12:06.

"I would think you were crazy if it didn't sound like a brilliant idea," she stated with a coy smile, reaching backward and grabbing two pillows, making themselves comfortable. "What have you got?" she queried, trying to sneak a look in the bag.

"First off, in my defense, the only thing that is open at midnight on a weekday in Mt Thomas is the servo," he stated solemnly and Maggie rolled her eyes at his excuse, waiting impatiently. "But I do have a mini packet of coco pops, which comes with its very own plastic spoon," he stated tossing the items out of the bag as he identified them. "An apple fruit box for me, and of course tropical for you," he stated knowingly "Some kind of repulsive breakfast bar, M& Ms, cracker and cheese pack, chips and a banana if your health conscious," he stated, tossing the plastic bag onto the floor. Maggie gave him a grin as she began unwrapping the breakfast bar while PJ shot her a look of disgust.

"Thank you" she stated as she met his gaze, his eyes darkening slightly as he reached over cupping her face, his thumb gently stroking her cheek. "No problem" he stated as she leaned forward capturing his mouth with hers. She snaked her arm around his neck, deepening the kiss before he pulled back slightly, grazing her lips with his own.

They broke apart slowly and he gave her a small smile "Told you it would be the same in the morning" he responded knowingly and she just gave a nod in return, a smile plastered upon her face.

"So…" she started, trying to move her thoughts away from the X rated images currently fluttering through her brain. PJ had obviously noticed her need to change the topic as he too struggled to alter his current one-track mind.

His eyes scanned the room, and he turned to her curious "You haven't received the rest of your stuff yet?" he queried, scrunching up the packet of chips and reaching for the coco pops, not bothering with milk.

Maggie gave a shake of her head as she peeled the banana, taking a bite before responding, "This is it," she admitted, watching the surprise travel across his features.

She gave him a sheepish smile, reading his thoughts "A lot of my stuff was burned in the fire and I took nothing with me that night." She stated feeling the need to explain, "I moved around a lot at first and it was too hard. If there was a safety threat they could move me at any time so I just rented the equipment and furniture I needed," she finished, not meeting his eye.

"You don't have to explain, just surprised," he reassured her, as he took another spoon full of coco pops "But it makes sense" he admitted, allowing a comfortable silence to fall.

"I want you to feel like you can ask," she stated a few moments later, and PJ looked up at her as she met his gaze. "I don't know how much you want to know, if you want to know, but if you have questions," she started reaching for her fruit box "Then I'll answer them the best I can."

He gave a small nod in return, before turning to her "Goes both ways," he replied adamantly "Mags if there's anything you want to know about the last three years," he stated and she gave a small nod.

"Anything?" she prompted softly and he nodded, noticing her hesitance as she spoke.

"What is it?" he demanded, knowing there was something, something she was afraid to ask.

"Nothin-" she began but was cut off by PJ's stern "Maggie"

She gave a small sigh in response before shuffling over towards him, shoving the food aside. He looked up at her questioningly, knowing that the food had been a safety barrier, preventing them moving too quickly. She placed a hand on his knee, before capturing his mouth with hers, her tongue running along his. As she deepened the kiss, his body took over, pulling her closer towards him, one arm encircling her waist, the other keeping them upright. She broke the kiss, leaning to whisper in his ear "I can't deal with it yet," she admitted softly in response to his earlier probing.

PJ shifted slightly to meet her gaze, arm still wrapped around her waist. "It's not about us," she whispered reassuringly and he gave a small nod, his mind processing her words, his eyes searching hers. He saw the brief flash of hurt, before she quickly hid it, casting him a forced smile. He bit his lip, muscles tensing as he realized what this was about. He knew her better then he knew himself and he knew there were few people that could make her hurt like that. Her family. He felt the anger radiate inside of him. Mick. God he hoped that bastard rotted in hell.

Maggie felt him tense underneath her and gulped at the cold look in his eye. She felt her heart constrict as the anger rolled from him, and she knew he knew what she had been asking. She reached up, caressing his cheek gently, and he jumped slightly startled by her touch.

"Don't," she whispered softly as she ran her hand reassuringly up his arm, feeling the strain of every tense muscle "It won't change anything,"

He exhaled slowly, knowing the truth of her words as he used his other arm to shift her onto him, her back against his chest as his arm encircled her waist, placing a small kiss on her cheek. She leaned back against him, finally feeling like she had truly come home with his arms wrapped tightly around her.

"Keith Pervis has lost another bulldozer," he stated softly and Maggie felt herself burst into laughter at the abrupt change in conversation, the tension from moments earlier dissipating.

"Bloody Keith" she responded shaking her head fondly "When will he learn?" she added with another snigger.

"I think he's a lost cause" he replied resignedly, placing a small kiss under her ear. She felt her body shiver and then PJ's smile against her back, obviously enjoying the instant reaction her body seemed to have to his touch.

"Wait a second" Maggie responded, a thought striking her "Did the bulldozer go missing yesterday?" she asked suddenly very interested.

"Something like that" he replied casually, trailing a couple of soft kisses along her neck. She closed her eyes momentarily, her skin flaming where he had kissed her as she struggled to keep her mind on track.

"Leila," she stated as he continued to trail kisses along her neck more frequently, and he sighed in defeat, "Really doesn't help the mood when you call out someone else's name" he mumbeled aginst her ear.

She felt her cheek tinge slightly, as she turned to face him "That's not what I meant," she stated a coy smile on her face. "What I was saying was the other day Leila was catching me up on the gossip, and she was mentioning how Linda Staiss had been courting the Mason boy whose parents own the farm next to Keith's," she stated, looking up at him expectantly.

"Hitting the fast forward button Mags," he stated, waiting for her to connect the dots, although not all that interested in Keith Pervis at that particular moment.

"Well Linda's a city girl, so apparently Billy Mason has been showing her the sights." She elaborated, talking quicker and PJ's blank stare "When Billy came into the imperial the other day, I heard him talking about how it seemed like someone had been doing something with the quarry, apparently it had been cleared somewhat,"

"Mags" he stated getting slightly exasperated and her inability to tell the story in two sentences or less.

"The quarry extends past the main area to where there is a large dip about twelve feet deep, it would partially submerge a bulldozer easily, then it's not much to locate a tarp. It wouldn't look at all out of place in an old abandoned quarry," she stated, eyeing him expectantly as she finished her theory.

"First thing tomorrow," he responded resignedly answering her question and she reached up placing a small peck on his lips.

"You miss police work," he added knowingly and she gave a brief nod in response "Yes," she admitted but then gave a small shrug "Not so badly when I can investigate vicariously through you," she teased and he rolled his eyes in response.

He watched as she yawned tiredly as she stole a quick glance at the clock behind him. He cringed when 3:36 shone back at him, knowing he was going to be exhausted for work. Maggie shifted in response, cursing when she too caught eye of the time.

"I better go," he stated resignedly, irritated that he had a job to go to in the morning. She placed a hand on his knee, stopping him, as she twisted to meet his eye "You can stay if you want," she offered with a small smile "I promise to be on my best behavior,"

"It's not you I'm worried about," he admitted softly, placing a small peck on her lips as he gently shifted her off his lap as he rose.

"Yes, but we're both tired and neither of us were sleeping earlier tonight," she stated and PJ gave a resigned sigh, knowing that he would be tossing and turning despite his exhaustion if he headed home.

He gave a small nod in resignation as Maggie turned off the light, slipping back into bed as PJ removed his clothing to his boxers and t-shirt before sliding into the other side. She turned slightly, biting her lip to keep from laughing as she watched him grab a spare pillow shoving it between them.

"Feel better?" she inquired, a slight teasing in her voice

He was silent in return and she couldn't help but smirk as she reached over to the alarm "What time?" she asked and he gave a small sigh before responding "Seven,"

Maggie nodded, despite the darkness, programming the alarm before settling herself back down "Goodnight PJ," she stated softly, snuggling into the covers.

"Goodnight," he responded as he closed his eyes, a few minutes later finally falling into a deep sleep.


	11. Part 2: Chapter 6

**Author's Note**: First I want to apologize for the lack of readability in the last two chapters. I have very quickly gone through and edited the two pieces and will attempt to do a more thorough cleanup in the future.

Consider this update your xmas present. But I do have the next chapter almost finished, which may be up by xmas eve if I'm inspired by motivation between now and then. Again, please let me know what your thinking in regards to this piece. And remember, Xmas is an even better time to give reviews.

On that note, reviews are excellent motivation for writers so I urge you all to consider leaving one. And if anyone is reading 'Man Made Memories' by Catty, please leave a review in hopes that she will update soon.

**Part 2: Chapter 6**

Maggie sat at her new desk, files stacked high, as she remained momentarily paralyzed by the sheer volume of work surrounding her.

"Feel good to be back?" Dash commented as she sauntered past, taking a seat on her chair, her own desk now located inches from Maggie's.

"Yes" she replied, a slight strain in her voice "A little daunting," she admitted as she eyed the mountains of paperwork in front of her "Where did all this come from" she stated, motioning to the large piles that were currently creating a fort around her desk.

"We've fallen a bit behind," Dash admitted throwing her a sympathetic look as she indicated to the piles "Since you have no file reports, I think Tess saw it as a good opportunity to get the general station filing done"

"Well at least I'm helping," she stated positively, and Dash snickered slightly at the air of reluctance in her tone as she slowly grabbed the first file off the top of the highest stack.

"Yes you are," Dash commented a slight teasing in her voice "Except the fact that your dying to get back out there," she finished knowingly and Maggie opened her mouth to protest, before shutting it, giving a small nod.

"But it's still police work," she stated as she picked up the pen, flicking the file open "It's better than nothing," she added, trying to enjoy the task despite the monotony.

Dash shook her head "See if you're still saying that in a few hours" she replied dryly, as she turned back to her own desk, papers strewn from one end to the other.

Maggie was half way through her second report, when she felt herself frown as she squinted at the form, trying to make sense of the writing. She peered around the station area and gave a sigh of relief when she noticed that Ben had just hung up the phone.

She picked up the page as she rose from her chair, walking over towards his desk and he sent her a smile as he watched her approach.

"Hey there stranger," he greeted, looking her up and down as he gave her an appreciative glance "How does it feel to be back in uniform?" he asked, genuine interest sparkling in his eyes.

"Almost like I never left," she responded with a smile "I mean it would help if I knew the crazy new procedural policies but I'm getting there," she finished, a hint of frustration in her voice.

He let out a small laugh in response, indicating to the paper in her hand "Is that to what I owe your sudden appearance" he stated with a laugh as she let out a resigned huff passing the paper over, his eyes skimming the contents.

"I don't understand what it wants me to do," she admitted and he indicated for her to make her way around his desk, tilting the computer screen so she could read the information provided.

The sudden BANG snapped her attention from the screen as she instinctively turned to the source of the intrusive noise. The screen door was still vibrating from the force as PJ stormed into the station, his posture tense, eyes focused as he moved straight into his office, a louder THUD indicating his departure from the main area. She looked around the station as each of her colleagues grimaced before turning back to their work, ignoring the detective odd behavior. Self-preservation was a wonderful thing. Tess, however, looked convincingly irritated as she sauntered to his door, giving a symbolic knock before wrenching the door open and clicking it shut quietly behind her. Maggie felt a small stab of jealousy as she watched the other blonde enter his office, hating that she was buried in paperwork and he was in there, detecting with someone else.

Ben subtly cleared his throat as Maggie snapped back to attention, banishing thoughts of PJ from her mind. She gave Ben a slight nod to go on, silently communicating an apology as he continued his explanation of the new form.

Three hours later, Maggie could not help the sigh of relief that escaped when Jack plonked down the lunch box. She was instantly on her feet as she shuffled through the box, claiming her sandwich hungrily. She casted a quick look over towards PJ's office, before giving a small shrug and picking up his lunch as well. She walked over, lightly tapping on his door and for the first time waiting for the polite "Come in".

She tried to hide her surprise when she saw Tess still seated across from him, both focused upon the file in front. Two sets of eyes turned to look at her and she felt slightly self-conscious as she passed PJ his lunch.

"Thought you might not get to it," she supplied somewhat awkwardly, not quite use to Tess' presence "I didn't see your lunch in there," she stated, turning to Tess as PJ gave a small shake of his head.

"Tess brings her own," he supplied distractedly, eyes briefly flicking back to the file before glancing up "Thanks by the way, I'm starving" he admitted, eyes meeting hers briefly before turning back towards Tess and his work.

"I'll leave you to it," she stated with a small half-smile as she turned to leave the office, feeling somewhat out of place.

She clicked the door shut behind her and exhaled the breath she had not even known she had been holding. She shook her head slightly, as she contemplated the situation, trying to rationalize her feelings. What was wrong with her, she thought inwardly as she tried to quell the territorial jealously that was coiling in her abdomen. She had never had a problem with separating them from work before. Nevertheless, the little voice inside her could not help but point out that that was before a three-year separation, before the appearance of Tess and back when she actually knew how to be a police officer. She let out a small sigh, it must be the paperwork, she thought to herself, slowly making her way back to her desk. A day of endless paperwork would make anyone emotionally loopy she thought as she again picked up her pen, adamant that the faster she got through it the quicker it would end.

It was just over five hours later when PJ finally emerged from his office having suffered a barrage of telephone calls in the afternoon that had doubled the amount of work on his desk. It still amazed him how one ten minute phone call could result in four hours worth of extra work. He made his way out to the main station area, a slight tweak of jealousy forming as he watched Maggie and Ben lean across the desk, her laughter echoing through the air, both having knocked off for the night. Maggie turned at the sound of his footsteps, giving him a small smile as he walked over to the pair.

"I was waiting for you" she greeted giving him a warm smile "You've been in there for hours" she noted and he gave a small tired nod in reply.

"I just thought one of those giant stacks of paperwork had fallen over and finally crushed you" Ben joked humorously, smirking slightly at PJ's pointed look.

"Coming for a drink?" Ben asked, eyes alternating between the two of them. PJ was about to decline when Dash's voice interrupted from behind "You have to, first day back celebratory drinks," she declared with a smile and Maggie gave a small nod enthused, "Sounds like a good idea,"

"OK well I'll grab the others and we'll head on over now," Ben commented as he moved from the desk towards the locker room "Say meet in twenty," he called over his shoulder as he headed out of sight. Dash made her way towards the door, stopping momentarily "You two coming?" she prodded and PJ gave a small nod "We'll be a long in a minute," he stated as Dash headed out.

Maggie turned to him, noting his tired eyes "You okay?" she asked concerned and PJ gave a small nod, unable to suppress the yawn "Just tired, long day," he supplied as she placed a comforting hand on his arm. "Can I talk to you for a minute," he stated and she nodded as he led her back towards his office, closing the door behind them.

He had barely closed the door when she felt his arm encircle her waist, pulling her towards him as he met her lips in a hungry kiss, gently nipping at her lower lip as he rested his head against hers, his breath warm against her cheek. .

"If Tess sees us…," she murmured as he recaptured her mouth with his, soft and gentle.

"We're off duty" he responded, placing another small peck upon her lips as she moved her hands down to his chest.

"And in uniform, at the station" she reminded him, and herself, as she slowly broke apart from his embrace.

He gave a small nod but did not break his hold upon her waist as he leaned in towards her "So what was so funny?" he pried, indicating to the station area where she had been talking with Ben.

She retracted slightly, a small frown on her features and he knew his question had not come across as casual as he had hoped.

"You're kidding" she stated, irritation seeping into her tone as she eyed him expectantly, her body having gone tense in his arms.

"It's not what you think, I don't have an issue with Ben," he stated meeting her gaze as he tried to sooth her before letting out a resigned sigh at her questioning look.

"I…" he started diverting his gaze briefly from hers, obviously slightly embarrassed "I'm not trying to be possessive" he stated, irritated by his own actions "I just…want to…god I don't even know" he admitted softly, unable to deal with his unfamiliar emotions.

Maggie felt her heart tug as she watched her normally composed detective shuffle under her gaze. She met his eye and felt her cheeks flame as she turned to him "I know the feeling," she admitted meekly and he tilted his head, curiosity written on his expression.

"Tess," she supplied and felt herself blush in embarrassment as he stared at her baffled.

"Tess," he repeated although his tone seemed to suggest how ludicrous he believed that notion to be.

"She got to be in here today working your case with you," she replied in explanation as she pouted, breaking eye contact "While I was at my desk, filling out paper after paper"

His eyebrows shot up amused at her childish outburst and she sighed, cheeks continuing to burn with embarrassment as she shifted under his gaze. She opened her mouth to apologize but he lent forward capturing her lips in a soft kiss, silencing her.

"I don't want Tess, or anyone else," he stated, meeting her gaze and she gave him a small smirk in response "I know," she admitted before adding teasingly "No one else would put up with you anyway,"

He gave her an indignant huff before letting a small smile form as she met his gaze, opening her mouth to speak. "I think this…feeling…" she began deliberately sidestepping the word 'jealousy' as she met his gaze "It will fade, I just think it's because it's my first day back and I'm still settling back in and with us…and everything" she started but was interrupted when his lips covered hers, silencing her with another gentle kiss.

"You're rambling," he noted with a grin as he pulled back slightly. She nodded in recognition of the truth of his words before grinning back at him, his eyes twinkling with amusement as she leaned forward. She sighed when a sharp knock at the door signaled the end of their activities as he took a step back from her.

"Come in" he called, turning to face the bemused Ben as he poked his head into the office, giving them both a knowing look.

"Am I interrupting something?" he asked teasingly, taking into account Maggie's flushed cheeks and the slightly off-balanced detective.

"No" they both replied in unison and he stifled a chuckle at the warning glare they both casted his way.

"You guys ready to go then?" he asked as they both nodded, joining the group as they headed towards the pub. Jack has sauntered up to Maggie and she turned to him, falling into step as they fell into conversation. Despite his tiredness, he could not help the small smile that tugged his lips. She belonged here. Every day it was beginning to feel like no time had passed.


	12. Part 2: Chapter 7

**Author's Note**: Merry Xmas. Enjoy your update :)

**Part 2: Chapter 7**

"Your wine," Maggie declared as she passed the delicate glass into PJ's outstretched hand, taking a seat on the couch as she tucked her feet underneath her and turned to face him.

He gave her a small smile in thanks as he raised the glass, clearing his throat "A toast to the gorgeous Maggie Doyle's official return to the force," he declared as he lifted his glass. She casted him a small smile as she clinked her glass against his, a warm glow spreading at his use of the word 'gorgeous.'

"I thought we toasted that at the pub earlier," she replied smugly, a slight teasing in her voice. The festivities had begun at the Imperial, however the two of them had left early, deciding to relocate the celebration. She took a sip of her wine as she briefly diverted her gaze from his as an assortment of images flashed through her head. She had to get her hormones in check she admonished inwardly before glancing back towards him, noticing a small grin on his features. She felt a small blush tinge her cheeks as she gave him a small embarrassed smile, sometimes she hated he could read her so easily.

"We did but that was the public toasting," he responded answering her earlier remark as he leant closer "You did offer me a private part of the night," he added, resting an arm over the couch.

"Did I?" she replied innocently, head tilting as she continued their familiar banter, the alcohol fueling the underlying innuendo.

"Well you said I didn't have to share," he reminded, placing the glass down upon the table before shifting closer towards her, eyes locked.

She did not reply as she mimicked his movements, placing the glass down before leaning forward, capturing his lips in a gentle kiss. She pulled back slightly, her lips hovering inches from his mouth, and she smiled as his eyes darkened with intensity. He let out a low growl, growing tired of their teasing as his arm encircled her waist, drawing her up against him as he met her lips with his. Repressed passion and desire ignited and he instantly deepened the kiss, pulling her hard against him as she snaked her arm around his neck, both relishing in the feel of the other. Their breathing was shallow when they were finally forced apart and he rested his head against hers as they tried to retain some semblance of control.

"Definitely don't need our inhabitations lowered," he stated shakily, his breath hot against her cheek.

"No," she confirmed, as she tilted her head slightly in order to meet his eyes. His hand reached up to cup her face as she leant into his touch, her fingers resting gently upon his upper thigh.

"We probably shouldn't," she stated softly but despite her words she felt herself lean forward, her mouth inches from his as her second hand slid up to rest on his shoulder.

"You're probably right," he agreed as he closed the distance between them, capturing her mouth with his. He shifted his weight backwards, allowing her to fall gently on top of him as they remained locked in their embrace. He let out a moan as he felt her hands begin to roam over his body, her hand gently sliding further up his leg. She let out a soft whimper as he broke their kiss, beginning to trail kisses down her neck to her shoulder, her body instantly reacting to his touch.

"PJ," she whispered softly, her raw emotions making her voice shake from the strain of trying to form a coherent thought. He gave a sly grin as he met her lips in a lingering kiss before placing a small peck against her cheek, tilting her chin as to meet her eyes.

"I love you Maggie Doyle," he stated, eyes boring into hers and he was surprised at the moisture in her eyes as a sudden tear began to trickle down her face.

"What is it?" he responded soothingly, alarmed by her sudden shift in mood as he rubbed his hand soothingly along her back.

"Nothing," she managed to choke as she took a deep breath, finally having calmed the tide of emotion that had overwhelmed her. She moved, placing a soft kiss upon his lips, a small smile on her face as she broke apart from him. He could taste the salt against his lips but said nothing as he turned his eyes to hers, waiting.

She ignored his questioning gaze as she caught his lips in a fiery kiss, hands moving down to tug at his shirt, as she felt him begin to unbutton hers, mouths hungrily interlocked. PJ felt his mind go blank, the sensations she was invoking burying any other coherent thought.

"I don't want to wait anymore," she murmured against his lips as she pulled back to meet his gaze.

He reached his hand up, fingers caressing her cheek as he eyed her, his own desire reflected in his eyes. "It was supposed to be different this time," he stated, a tone of defeat in his voice "There was suppose to be dinner or music or whatever it is those magazines tell you to do,"

Maggie shook her head slightly bemused as she leaned closer to him "We've never needed that," she pointed out with a small smile "Just each other," she finished as she dipped her head, dragging her lips across his.

"Maggie," he tried one more time but her name turned into a moan as she nipped at his bottom lip, her fingers trailing across his abdomen.

"Make love to me," she replied softly as she met his gaze, stilling her hands for a second, the silent communication flowing between them.

He reached up placing a soft kiss against her lips as he gently maneuvered her off him before interlocking his hand with hers, leading her towards the bedroom.

It was hours later when Maggie rolled onto her side, eyeballing the clock restlessly as she lay there, contemplating how many hours it would take for PJ to wake. She swore that clock had yet again grinded to a halt. Well actually, she thought with a sly smile, it seemed time had sped up remarkably earlier that night and had now halted. She glanced towards the large sleeping frame beside her, a smile crossing her features as she listened to his soft snore.

Her thoughts were interrupted at the sound of his breath hitching, the steady rhythm becoming slightly shallower.

"You awake?" She asked hopefully, waiting silently for an answer

"Yeah," he murmured groggily, nestling his face against the pillow as his arm lazily reached out towards her, encircling her waist and gently pulling her closer "Why aren't you sleeping?" he questioned as he forced his eyes open.

"Can't sleep," she responded although he heard the frustration in her voice "I'm sorry for keeping you up," she stated softly, running a finger along his chest absent-mindedly.

"You didn't wake me," he insisted, his muscles tensing in response to her soft touch. She felt a small smirk grace her features as she watched his body respond automatically before withdrawing her hand.

"What's keeping you up," he probed, moving his hand from her waist to stroke her hair gently, waiting for her to speak.

"Nothing," she responded automatically but she could feel his questioning gaze even in the dark "I just can't turn my mind off," she admitted softly, snuggling into the pillow, trying to get comfortable.

"Anything in particular?" he asked, his hand continuing to stroke her hair reassuringly.

"Us," she responded with a smile, snuggling closer into his embrace "Old memories, new ones," she stated softly, her head now resting upon his chest.

He moved his arms to wrap around her as he placed a gentle kiss upon her head "Many new ones," he commented before taking a deep breath. Maggie heard him inhale as his muscles tensed slightly, and she steeled herself, knowing he was readying himself for a confrontation.

"Maggie," he stated softly as he glanced down towards her, and she felt her own heart quicken as she let out a soft "Yeah," as she snuggled further into his warmth.

"Earlier," he started as he attempted to clear his throat, causing his chest to vibrate as he did so "Tonight in the living room, you were upset," he prompted, obviously hoping she was going to answer his unanswered question.

"I wasn't upset," she responded softly, her fingers lightly trailing across his chest as she refused to elaborate, her words hanging in the air.

"Then what was it?" he prompted as he removed his hand from her hair, resting it back upon her waist, inching her slightly closer.

Maggie took a deep breath, knowing from his tone he was not going to let this topic drop "I'm not sure" she admitted softly. She felt him exhale, no doubt frustrated by her avoidance and she gave a small sigh as she shifted slightly, tilting her head to meet his gaze.

"It's nothing," she began, trying to excuse her behavior as she fiddled somewhat self-consciously, before sighing in defeat when she saw the concern in his eyes.

"You said my name," she stated suddenly, tilting her head to hold his eye "You said that you loved me, Maggie Doyle," she added meeting his gaze, noting the confusion reflecting in his eyes as he struggled to understand.

She stifled a small sigh as he continued to look at her blankly a frown of puzzlement creasing his features "I do love you," he stated softly.

"I know," she stated, her smile splitting her face as she intertwined her fingers in his "But it's been a long time since someone has said that they love me as Maggie Doyle," she explained, watching as the realization began to dawn across his face. "The moment, everything, it just kind of struck me," she admitted, seeing the warmth and a hint of curiosity sparkle in his eyes.

He moved in, gently brushing his lips against hers in comfort before capturing her mouth in a soft, gentle kiss. The kiss was warm and comforting and she felt herself melting against him, her small frame once again falling to lie against his chest.

"What…" he began before shaking his head, obviously choosing to let the thought drop.

She shifted slightly against him tilting her head up to catch his eye "What?" she probed, looking at him expectantly. He opened his mouth to deny her silent accusation but she shook her head knowingly.

"I…" he started, trying to articulate his thoughts "The other week when you asked me if I wanted to know about your life…away from here," he started, eyes trained on the top of her head as he spoke "I do," he admitted as he met her gaze "I want to know you, last three years included." She gave a small nod in recognition as he trailed his fingers along her arm, "When you're ready to tell me," he added, feeling slightly awkward about raising the issue.

"I'm ready to tell you," she offered softly, reaching up to place a light kiss on his lips before pulling back to meet his eyes "What do you want to know?" she asked, as she propped herself up on her elbow, other arm still draped loosely across his chest.

"Not tonight," he replied softly, leaning over and placing a gentle kiss on her lips. "Tonight," he stated a mischievous glint in his eye "I just want to do this," he finished as she let out a yelp at the sudden feel of his hand on her waist as he rolled her underneath him, his large frame hovering inches from hers.

His eyes sought permission and she titled her head up towards him as he leaned down, meeting her lips in a soft kiss. The kiss was warm and comforting, and she laced an arm around his neck as the kiss deepened, the passion instantly igniting between them.


	13. Part 2: Chapter 8

**Part 2: Chapter 8**

"No you're beating it too hard!" Maggie exclaimed as she eyed the bowl in PJ's hand, hand wrapping around the eggbeater as she tried to pull it from his grasp.

"I'm doing what you said," he replied indignantly as she claimed the bowl and beater from his possession, placing them back upon the kitchen bench.

"You're supposed to fold it," she replied, grabbing the instruments to demonstrate as she gently folded the beater through the egg white "Not pound it into submission" she added, a small twinkle in her eye.

He gave a resigned sigh as he placed his fingers against his temple trying to ward off the incoming headache, unable to comprehend the difference between beating and folding mixtures. She gave him a knowing look, reaching up to place a small kiss on his cheek as she met his eye.

"You don't have to help if you don't want to," she offered as she continued to fold the egg whites trying to resuscitate them from PJ's brutal assault.

"I'm an excellent cook," he declared with a huff, unable to hide the humor in his voice as a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. "You know they say a way to a man's heart is through his stomach," he commented, a playful grin on his face as he placed a hand around her waist drawing her closer.

She opened her mouth to respond with a teasing comment when he countered her move by placing a soft kiss against her lips, silencing her. They broke apart slowly and she gave him a smile before moving out of his embrace.

He frowned shooting her a questioning look and she smirked indicating to the timer "Can't afford to get distracted," she stated, glancing down towards the egg whites, relieved to see they were making a recovery.

He rolled his eyes as he leaned against the counter before grabbing the open plastic bag and scooping out a small amount of chocolate chips, popping them into his mouth as he watched her.

"Hey!" she cried when she realized what he was eating, lunging for the packet as she sealed it, tossing it behind her onto the other bench. "Those are for cooking," she added sending him a playful death glare as she opened the fridge, placing the egg whites inside as she picked up her knife to continue the dicing.

"So why are you doing this again?" he asked, unable to keep his mind from wandering to all the other things they could possibly be doing alone in his house. None of his ideas involved using the kitchen in this particular manner.

"Because Dash is throwing s surprise party for her brother and I volunteered to cook when her sister called up sick a few days ago," she repeated for the third time as she watched him pop another choc-chip into his mouth.

"You know I don't remember being cooked such elaborate meals," he stated causally, eyeing the numerous dishes that were in various stages of development around the kitchen.

"Turn thirty again and I'll cook for you," she replied, as she reached for another vegetable, effortlessly peeling it before dicing it underneath her knife "Can you tell me if the butter is ready?" she stated suddenly, indicating to the stove.

PJ tentatively peered over the contents of the stove, allowing his nose to locate which one was the butter as he stared at the pot "Uh, its yellow," he supplied, looking up at her for some kind of guidance.

She rolled her eyes, a small grin on her face as she maneuvered backwards, quickly peering at the contents before thrusting him the spoon. "It's got a few minutes left," she replied indicating to the pot, "Gently stir it for about a minute," she instructed before taking a few steps back to the bench to finish the last of the veggies.

"I'm serious," he called, picking up on their last conversation as he awkwardly stirred the contents of the pot "Where did you learn to cook like this?" he asked, curiosity shinning as he indicated around the room "I mean besides a nice chicken and a salad, your culinary talents weren't this exceptional," he pointed out.

She let out an indignant huff in response although conceding his point as she collected the vegetables, hand reaching out for the spices as she lightly dusted them.

"A friend taught me," she stated, turning to peer at the pot he was stirring before gently lifting the lid on the pot adjacent, tasting the substance before adding just a pinch of spice and allowing it to simmer.

"A friend," he repeated looking up at her "A friend you met on witness?" he asked knowingly and she gave a small nod as she began to reach for the pastry upon the bench.

"What was he like?" PJ asked casually and she had to strain to hold back the snort at his lack of subtlety.

"She," Maggie emphasized with a slight grin "Her name was Sandra, I met her when I was in Perth," she admitted, testing the waters, seeing just how much he really wanted to know.

"You were in Perth?" he asked, his tone indicating that he was extremely intrigued despite both of them trying to keep the conversation light.

"I've been to quite a few places," she admitted as she moved over, indicating for PJ to shove as she gently took the butter off of boil and indicated to the other pot, giving him another spoon as he began to stir.

"But this Sandra," he stated trying the word on his lips "You must have spent quite a bit of time with her to be able to cook like this," he commented, eyeing the contents of his kitchen as she effortlessly alternated from one dish to another.

"She owned a restaurant, well her family did," she supplied as she measured the various ingredients for the next dish "She was the chef there and we just clicked," she added, casting a quick look over her shoulder to read his face. His eyes were trained on the pot in front of him and she could tell he was deep in thought, trying to process her words.

"So how did you meet her?" he asked, his voice holding nothing but curiosity as he continued to lazily stir the contents.

"I was waitressing for them," she admitted and this time she saw him freeze his head snapping around to stare at her and she felt her heart-beat quicken, that had certainly not been a casual response.

"You were a waitress," he repeated his tone unreadable and she turned to face him, giving him a nod as she met his eye.

"I just…" he started, trying to find the right words, as he looked at her "It's not something I ever saw you doing," he admitted softly. "You always said that you would hate to come in and do the same thing day after day," he elaborated, his heart constricting as he tried to comprehend what circumstances would lead her into a job she hated.

She gave a small nod in agreement, "I wasn't in a good place at the time," she admitted vaguely, trying to spare him the details. "Sandra was…more than I could have hoped," she admitted softly, needing to share with him the story now that they had begun.

"What do you mean?" he asked softly, listening to every word as she opened up to him, the cooking momentarily forgotten.

"She could tell I was running from something, but she never asked, she was just there. She invited me into her family," she stated a smile gracing her features at the memory of her friend.

"She sounds like a good friend ," he stated softly, as he moved his hand resting on her waist as he looked at her worried face, placing a small kiss against her head, "I'm glad she was there" he added as he waited for her to continue, sensing her hesitance.

She gave a small nod but instead of continuing broke away, eyes darting to the stove before she took a deep breath trying to re-orientate herself.

He took a calming breath as he watched her re-divert her attention back to the meal. Whatever it had been she obviously had chosen not to share it with him. He stifled a sigh, he hated the barriers that were still between them. Hated the facets o her life that were still a mystery. Well if he wanted to know, he thought inwardly, he was going to have to ask.

"So…" he started as he turned back to the pot, inwardly cursing himself as his word turned the silence slightly awkward "You said you had been many places," he commented as she turned indicating for him to take the pot off the stove . He did so, knowing that the pot probably had to cool as he slid it off the flame.

"Uh a few, I was relocated a couple of times," she admitted as she indicated for him to open the oven door as she slid the pastry tray into the oven, giving him a small smile as she took a moment to lean tiredly against the bench.

He felt his throat constrict at her words as he struggled to swallow the bile that had arisen. He knew that witness only relocated their charges when they believed there to be a security scare. He also knew that a relocation meant starting over, another new identity, another new location, no contact. He took a deep breath, he was beginning to think her words of 'being in a bad place' would have been the understatement of the century.

She watched as the emotions played out across his features and felt her heart constrict as realization dawned in his eyes. He moved quickly and suddenly she felt his lips crushing against hers, heated and possessive as he pulled her body closer to his, arms wrapping around her, as he continued to probe her mouth. He was unyielding as he continued the kiss, making her fight for breath and control as she felt her body automatically respond. Lack of oxygen finally wrenched them apart momentarily before he began to move in again. She gave him a small smile before placing a hand on his chest, stopping him as she looked up to meet his gaze.

"I'm ok" she stated softly, reaching up to cup his cheek as she gave him a small smile, watching his inner struggle as he gave a small nod trying to accept her words.

She reached forward, cupping his face as she placed a gentle kiss across his lips, knowing the thought that her life had been in danger was leaving him unsettled, helpless. She broke the kiss, as she leaned into his chest, his arms encircling her, briefly taking comfort in each other.

"Oh No!" she suddenly exclaimed as she broke their embrace, pushing him back, as she rushed to the grill. She let out a string of curses as a small puff of smoke greeted her. PJ could not help but laugh at the absurdity of their situation as she quickly tried to fan off the smoke, eyeing the homemade foccachia bread with uncertainty.

She threw him a look as he tried to stifle the laughter as she peered at the bread, contemplating.

"How is it?" he asked, not overly concerned as he watched her grab a knife from the draw, cutting a few small pieces of meat.

"Fixable," she replied with an amount of certainty as she gently lay the cut pieces onto the foil before sliding them into the grill. He looked at her questioningly as she gave a small shrug.

"I'll cut off the small singed areas, grill that meat and then place it around where I've cut it." She declared as she threw the scrapes in the sink, "Then I'll grill it together for a couple of seconds so the cheese blends the ingredients and it should be fine," she finished with a triumphant grin.

"Glad to hear it," he replied with a small smile as he sauntered over to her "I do have to tell you this cooking thing is very attractive," he stated as he placed his hand against the small of her back.

She smirked, giving him an odd look as she eyed him "Really, you think me covered in flour and paste is attractive," she countered her tone disbelieving as she tried to turn back to the recipe in front of her.

"Hmm," he replied into her ear, placing a small kiss just underneath her earlobe. She shivered automatically in response, his breath hot against her neck and she did not need to turn to know he was grinning at her response.

"I need to finish this," she stated with a smile as she tried to shrug him off "If you keep distracting me I'm going to burn more things," she stated, turning to meet his eye "And nobody will believe me when I tell them I can cook,"

He gave a small chuckle as he released her, letting her move freely around the kitchen as she moved over to the stove, lining the pastry in the dish.

"I'll stick up for you," he replied with a smile and she let out a small laugh in response, casting him a quick glance "Well I think your credibility may be lacking considering you have never tasted my cooking," she countered with a smile.

"Well were you planning on rectifying that any time soon?" he pouted as he eyed the array of food spread across his kitchen.

She felt herself grin in response as she indicated to the fridge "Top shelf, towards the back, I made it last night," she stated as she redirected her gaze to layering the dish.

He shot her a confused look before doing as instructed his eyes widening as he located the object he had no doubt she had been referring to. She chuckled as she watched his eyes widen as he sent her a questioning look.

"Well I knew that eventually you would get bored helping me and though you may need a distraction," she stated as he maneuvered around her to grab a spoon, a content smile on his face.

"What's in it?" he probed as he eyed the dish in front of him, his joy inconceivable as he looked at her expectantly.

"Well on the plate you have Biscuit Tortoni" she stated with a smile. "It has alcohol in it, with about a truckload of sugar," she admitted as she indicated the glass "And since I know I could not leave out the chocolate," she stated with a sly grin "I created you your very own desert in the cocktail glass.'"

"So what's in it?" he said with a smile as he took a seat at the table looking at her expectantly.

"Well homemade chocolate mousse, with small chocolate chunks and a fudge sauce" she began listing off the items, "And at the bottom, think hardened chocolate pieces" she stated eyeing his reaction as he loaded a generous amount on his spoon. He closed his eyes as the taste swirled across his tongue letting out a murmur of appreciation.

"There are very few things in the world that are better than this" he stated as he took another mouthful "Actually only one thing" he amended as the creamy texture filled his mouth, his taste buds tingling.

She let out a laugh at his antics as she continued layering the main dish, awkwardly opening the oven door as she placed the dish underneath the home made pizza currently cooking within.

"Have I told you lately that I love you," he called as she popped her head up to see he was quickly reaching the end of the glass.

"You have," she commented with a smile as she set the timer, before walking over to sit beside him, content that nothing would burn or spoil while she took a quick five minutes to sit.

He gave her a grin as she sat down beside him before offering his plate but she shook her head more than aware of the ingredients needed to achieve the sensual taste that PJ was currently enjoying.

"Maggie," he stated as he gently placed the glass back down on the table. She turned to him, noticing the change in his demeanor as he reached out, taking her hand in his, meeting her eyes.

"I'm glad you're okay," he stated softly, taking a deep breath as he searched her eyes "But if you weren't, you don't have to be strong for me," he stated giving her a small reassuring smile.

She nodded in response, feeling a small weight lift off her shoulders as she placed her other hand on top of his "Okay," she conceded, meeting his eyes, letting a comfortable silence fall between them.

She leaned in as she brushed her lips against his before he took control, placing his mouth firmly against hers as he reached over to cup her face before gently pulling back.

"I've got to finish this meal," she stated with a tinge of regret as she slowly headed back towards the kitchen. He gave a small nod in return before he followed placing the used dished into the sink.

"I've actually got a few errands to run," he admitted picking up the stack of bills he had placed on the microwave as he grabbed his car keys. He paused to place a quick peck on her cheek before indicating to the door.

"I'll be back in half an hour," he declared casting her a smile "Try not to burn down the place when I'm gone"

She rolled her eyes in response as he gave her one last quick peck before heading towards the door, shutting it quietly behind him.


	14. Part 2: Chapter 9

Author's Note: Unbeated so may be a few errors. Don't expect a quick update, but enjoy.

**Part 2: Chapter 9**

"You're quiet tonight" PJ commented as he eyed Maggie, the sound of the forgotten movie playing in the background. She rubbed her eyes tiredly in response, her feet currently resting on PJ's thighs as she lay stretched across the couch, giving him a tired smile.

"Just some things on my mind" she admitted softly, as she reached for the now cold coffee upon the table, grimacing as she took a sip.

"Past or present?" he inquired, running his fingers along her leg in comfort.

"Bit of both," she admitted softly before taking a deep breath, eyes locking onto his "Dad," she elaborated, a slight anguish in her voice at the mention of her father.

"Have you talked to him?" he asked softly, his body tensing although his voice remained full of comfort and concern. She gave a small shake of her head as she shifted, climbing to rest by his side, her head falling to his shoulder as his fingers stroked her hair.

"He knew I was back, but he didn't make a request to see me. I don't know what that means," she stated, her voice sounding meek and PJ felt his heart constrict at the pain in her voice.

"I'm sure he wants to see you," he stated softly in assurance placing a soft kiss on her forehead, silently vowing to kill Pat if he did anything to upset Maggie.

"The last time I saw him, he was so angry…so hurt about the wedding, everything," she stated with a sigh, breaking eye contact as she diverted her gaze. "I lied to him, right before I left…everything was a lie and then when I did leave…" she trailed off, feeling the single tear slide down her cheek as he pulled her more firmly into his embrace.

"Even you," she stated softly, voice hitching as she felt another tear slide down her cheek "When you first saw me…" she started, taking a deep breath "I knew you loved me but even you had trouble with everything."

"Maggie look at me," he commanded, voice lowering as he shifted his shoulder forcing her to look at him ""I always wanted you here," he stated softly, cupping her face with both his hands, eyes boring into hers. She gave a small nod letting the truth of his words wash over her as he whipped away her tears.

"I just don't know what to do about Dad" she admitted softly, her voice choking slightly as she looked up at him, eyes moist. "He lost Mick as well, all his children…I can't think what that must have been like," she stated softly, her mind whirling as the tide of emotion continued to crush her.

PJ instinctively pulled her back into his embrace, feeling her tears wet his shirt as his mind continued to process her words, unease growing in the pit of his stomach. When she drew back, slightly more composed, he knew he had to ask.

"What did they tell you about Mick's death?" he asked softly, a tinge of regret in his voice as he tried to mentally prepare himself, hoping against hope that he wouldn't have to tell her.

"Uh that he was shot," she stated taking a deep breath, trying to recall the facts, confused at the sudden shift in conversation. "They said he had been caught and in desperation attacked a couple of cops and he died," she finished, looking up at him, confusion etched on her features as she saw him retract from her, creating some distance between them. "PJ is that not right?" she asked voice shaking as she eyed him intently.

"It's exactly right," he choked as he took a deep breath, reaching out to grab her hands in his own "But those two cops Maggie," he stated, his mind fighting with his instincts as he struggled to tell her, to do the right thing.

His silence lingered in the air and he could feel the tension rise in the room as he diverted his gaze from her. He was surprised when he felt her warm fingers against his cheek, forcing him to make eye contact as she waited.

"Did I know them?" she asked tentatively, trying to ascertain what he was trying to say, trying to save him the anguish of telling her the words. He gave a brief nod, as he bit his lip trying to maintain control of his emotions.

"PJ," she stated softly, rubbing his arm soothingly as she attempted to comfort him, letting him know that she was ready.

"Your Dad and I," he stated, voice hoarse as he spoke as he finally met her gaze. He frowned when he saw her blank expression, she had obviously missed the point.

"You and Dad what?" she asked as he diverted his gaze, waiting for her mind to connect the information. He heard her gasp in sudden realization and he wanted to melt into the floor, knowing that he was hurting her.

"Did you," she started softly, but stopped to take a deep breath before continuing "Did you shoot him?" she asked softly, fear and despair radiating from her as she looked at him expectantly for answers.

He shook his head before taking a deep breath "Mick had a gun on me," he stated, briefly glancing towards her before cowardly diverting his eyes, voice hoarse. "Pat had figured it out, he came in behind us and he made a choice," he stated voice choking on the words, taking a deep breath.

"Why were you there? What happened?" she demanded, her tone letting him know that she needed to hear the story, needed to know her lover and her father's role in the death of her brother.

"I had figured it out that afternoon," he stated voice hoarse as he continued to keep his eyes trained on the floor, unable to look at her as he felt her move further away. "I invited him over, called him on it, we were both armed," he stated recounting the events of that horrifying night. He felt his throat constrict, as he struggled to remain calm despite the fact she had now moved completely out of his grasp, staring at him as he continued his explanation.

"I wanted to rip him apart and he knew it so we discarded our guns," he stated taking a breath, glancing briefly towards her before diverting his gaze, the pain in her eyes haunting him "We fought, and then he drew his second weapon, and that's when your Dad came in."

"He shot Mick" Maggie stated, the words seemingly harsh despite her soft tone and all PJ could do was nod.

She was silent as the tension continued to mount, PJ still unable to look in her direction keeping his eyes trained on the ground, waiting for her to speak, to make a move.

"It's late, I should get going," she stated suddenly, rising off the couch as she bent over quickly grabbing her shoes as PJ's head snapped up at her words, his hand gently grazing her arms to gain her attention. He felt himself exhale when she did not flinch from his touch.

"Maggie, please stay," he stated softly, as he attempted to turn her to him. She refused however keeping her back facing him, her labored breathing echoing in the room.

"No," she stated her voice echoing off the walls as she shrugged off his hand, turning briefly to face him "I don't know what to think, I just need some time," she added before breaking the contact and heading for the door, shutting it firmly behind her. The moment the door clicked closed, she felt the tears stream down her face.

Maggie sat in her room later that night as she stared at the TV screen. She had never quite understood the movie, she mused, tilting her head as she contemplated the actors on screen. How they had managed to make five Rocky movies she would never know. She heard a knock on her door and she felt every muscle constrict as her head snapped to the clock. 2:00am in the morning. The Imperial was closed. So who the hell was knocking on her door?

"Maggie its PJ," she heard him say, his voice somewhat muffled. She closed her eyes in an attempt to steady herself as she slowly rose making her way to the door. She unbuckled the chain as she creaked open the door, blocking the entrance with her body. She made no move to invite him in but rather stared at him expectantly, waiting for him to speak.

"Can I come in?" he asked softly as she refused to meet his eye and he shuffled nervously as he waited for her answer.

She did not move but let out a sigh briefly glancing towards him "PJ I'm tired," she stated, her voice wary even as she spoke "I have an early shift tomorrow,"

"Look Maggie I just want to talk and I don't want to do it here in the hall," he insisted, eyes darting around the deserted corridor "I already had to wake up half the place so Chris would let me in," he stated, his tone holding just a bit of pleading. She sighed giving a small nod before stepping aside.

She perched herself on her bed while he lent against the coffee table, respecting her unspoken request for distance as he slowly met her eyes, clearing his throat before speaking "I meant what I said, if you want to know, I want to tell you," he started softly.

"I have to know," she stated, finally casting here eyes in his direction as she lifted her chin "Tell me," she stated, knowing there was no way she could prepare herself for what was to come. Knowing that she would never be ready to hear what he was about to say.

He gave a brief nod as he accepted her words, folding his arms in front of his chest as he casted his mind back, more than aware he was opening a Pandora's Box.

"When I first saw you and you told me you knew about Mick I didn't question it," he stated, having had hours to practice exactly it was he wanted to say. "I didn't want to question it, perhaps maybe I should have earlier and I am sorry for that," he admitted, his eyes never leaving her small frame as she sat upon the bed, staring at him intently.

"I know he was your brother and you loved him," he continued, the words holding a haunting déjà vu "But I'm not sorry for anything other than the fact that you're hurting," he stated, a slight venom seeping into his voice. Maggie's head snapped up at his tone, her brow furrowing as she watched him.

"He took you from me," he stated voice shaking as his eyes bored into hers "He took you, the most important thing in my life. Robbed us of our future," he continued, not bothering to hide the anguish in his voice as he attempted to continue. "I'm not sorry the bastard is dead and at the time part of me wished I had the guts to pull the trigger when he first walked in my door," he finished, body shaking with barely controlled anger.

She opened her mouth to speak but closed it, not having the slightest idea what to say.

"Maggie" he stated waiting until she met his eyes before continuing, "There is a lot of stuff that went down after you…left," he finished voice hoarse. "They only had one main suspect through the original investigation and after that the case was considered cold. There were too many possibilities and no way of narrowing it," he stated, his voice still unsteady as he dredged up the old memories.

"So they didn't have enough on Mick in the original investigation," she stated slowly, her voice echoing as she attempted to absorb what he was telling her.

He shook his head in response, leaning against her coffee table as he met her eyes, his pain evident as he continued, "No Mick wasn't even in the picture," he admitted taking a deep breath. "There was only one person with motive, one person with opportunity and one person who had been lying to everyone," he stated, voice catching on the words.

Maggie frowned, racking her brain for someone who fitted that profile as her mind consistently came up blank. "But no one else besides the three of us knew what was happening," she stated softly "I mean the Boss towards the end but that doesn't make sense," she stated, baffled.

"Me," he finished as he looked up at her and he heard her gasp as he took a deep breath.

"That doesn't make any sense, who could possibly think that!" she exclaimed, voice contorted with disbelief and contempt at the very accusation.

PJ shrugged his shoulders in response "We'd had a fight, broken up…and oddly enough I was telling them one story and Mick was telling another," he finished, diverting his gaze from her as he stared at the floor.

He nearly jumped when he felt her warm hand on his shoulder as he met her eyes, her fingers intertwining with his as she reached up to capture his mouth with hers. The kiss was deep as she pressed herself closer as if trying to protect him, comfort him, despite her comfort being three years late.

He wrapped his arms around her as he continued to probe her mouth with his tongue, releasing a small groan when she finally broke away, her face hovering inches from his own as she rested her forehead against his.

"I know you would never hurt me," she stated softly, running her fingers lightly across his face as she placed a small peck on his lips, his hands resting comfortably on her hips.

"Not even the detectives could make it stick," he stated with a forced smile as he attempted to lighten the mood, capturing her mouth in a soft kiss before breaking apart, meeting her eyes.

"Maggie, I try not to think about that time. I knew you had questions, but I honestly thought you knew more than they had told you," he stated in an attempt to apologize and she gave a small nod in reply.

"If I had just done what Barry Craig had told me to do, none of this would have happened," she stated, her voice cracking with regret and he pulled her against him as he engulfed her in a comforting hug.

"Don't do that to yourself," he whispered softly into her ear "It will kill you," he added knowingly, and she felt her heart constrict as she contemplated just how much experience went behind that advice.

They stayed like that, arms wrapped comfortingly around each other until their muscles began to tense and they regretfully broke apart.

"Is that everything?" she asked softly and he gave a small nod in return "Reader Digest version but yes" he replied, reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear. She leaned into his touch as she let out a small sigh, emotionally exhausted.

"Was…I mean…was there a funeral, for Mick?" she asked softly, wanting to know but hoping not to cause him any more pain.

PJ gave a small shrug in response "I think the Boss requested that he be taken back to Melbourne, I think I speak for many when I say that we didn't want him near you," he stated, and Maggie felt her heart constrict as she could just imagine him and her colleagues adamant that her memory be protected from his. She felt her breath hitch as she was reminded that was all she had left them with.

"You're here now," he stated softly and she blinked back, surprised, before giving him a small nod, sometimes forgetting how well he could read her.

"I think you should go see your Dad," he stated softly as she leant against his chest, his large arms still engulfing her as she listened to the rhythm of his heartbeat.

"What do I do if he doesn't want to see me?" she asked meekly, looking up towards him, her fear evident as he felt her heart quicken.

"Then you come home to me," he stated softly, his fingers grazing her cheek as he met her eyes "And we'll deal with it," he finished. She felt herself give him a small smile as she reached up, placing a light kiss on his lips, before pulling him gently towards the bed.

"Stay," she stated adamantly, placing a lingering kiss on his lips, as she indicated the covers "To sleep," she added when he gave her a playful grin and he let out a small chuckle before recapturing her lips.

"Set the alarm early, I'll have to head home before work," he instructed as he slid off his shirt and pants before tossing over the covers.

"You can leave some stuff here," she offered, as he draped an arm across her waist, spooning her small frame with his as she turned off the light.

"I didn't think the pub was going to be a long term thing," he replied as he placed a small kiss along her neck, head falling against the pillow as he made himself comfortable.

"Well I really haven't had time to look for a place," she admitted as she yawned, her own eyes drifting closed as she felt the warmth of his body surround her.

"You could live with me," he mumbled tiredly, snuggling closer to her, her hair tickling his cheek where he lay.

"Not until I see ring," she mumbled in response, eyes still closed as she began to doze, content in his embrace.

He let out a small chuckle as he began to fade into sleep "I'll keep that in mind" he smiled as sleep finally took hold.


	15. Part 2: Chapter 10

Author's Note: I have good intentions to finish but we'll see how we go. The relationship has to develop, otherwise it becomes out of character so I can't just skip to the end. Anyway these chapters, like the others, are not beta read...otherwise with real life they would most likely never get posted. One day I will go through every chapter and fix up the mistakes which make me cringe. Until such time, enjoy it for what it is.

**Part 2: Chapter 10**

"So what you think we should just let her go?" PJ demanded voice rising slightly in volume as he stared at her in disbelief.

"No I'm not saying that," Maggie retorted irritably as she matched his stare, eyes narrowing. "I just don't think in this case throwing away the key is going to help," she added, volume rising to match his.

"Well that's not our decision to make," he stated with a huff. "We build a case and the courts decide, not you" he finished turning to stalk away from her.

She snorted in response, clear disbelief in her tone as she continued, "Where did the sudden belief in the court system come from?" she asked dryly as he stopped turning to face her. "And as police officers we do have the discretion to charge," she stated, folding her arms across her chest defiantly.

"Are you two quite finished?" the Boss demanded as he exited his office. He inwardly sighed as he watched his two longest serving members eye each other down in the middle of the station. Both turned, startled at his sudden presence in their debate, sheepish looks covering both their faces.

"Yes Boss," Maggie replied her head dipping slightly as she accepted the unspoken reprimand. He heard PJ attempt a mumbled apology, and he gave them both an accepting nod, as he stepped in to referee their debate.

"Have you decided to charge the young girl?" he asked, focusing on PJ although he continued to watch his Senior Constable out of the corner of his eye.

PJ took a deep intake of breath, glancing briefly towards Maggie before giving him a nod, "Yes we're going to charge her," he stated clearly. He ignored her subtle flinch, feeling her eyes burning into him, her disagreement obvious.

"Well then you better get on to it," the Boss stated, satisfied. PJ gave a brief nod, "I'll organize the paperwork now," he responded, taking the opportunity to head towards his office, shutting the door firmly behind him.

Maggie felt the irritation rise as she watched his retreating form, despite knowing that it was PJ's case and his call. She turned to the Boss and he held up his hand, knowing what she was about to say.

"His case Doyle, his call," he stated clearly and she bit back a growl of frustration as she again opened her mouth to speak. Again, the Boss held up his hand stopping her. "He's made the call Doyle, it's no longer your concern," he stated, a hint of warning in his voice as he eyed his young officer, "In any way," he added, voice firm. "Now since the rest of your colleagues are out why don't you swing by the Imperial and grab the lunches," he instructed, watching her expectantly as she bit back a sigh. She gave a small nod in understanding as she reluctantly grabbed her hat and keys as she made her way out the station.

PJ rolled his shoulders to ease the aching muscles as he continued to focus on the assortment of papers in front of him. He honestly felt like he was drowning in a sea of incident reports, affidavits and court listings. He sighed as he flicked through the stack to his right, becoming somewhat agitated when he could not locate the interview transcript. At this rate, he was going to spend every day until his retirement locked up in his office, he thought bitterly to himself. He heard a small knock on his door, quickly glancing up to see her stick her head into his office. He did not have to say anything as she canvassed the documents spread across his desk and his irritated scowl.

"What have you lost?" she enquired knowingly as she closed the door behind her. He glanced at her slightly miffed at her assumption before sighing in defeat. "Transcript of the Jamenson interview," he replied and she nodded as she made work on the stack closest to her right.

"This transcript?" she asked a few minutes later and he lifted his gaze, giving her a thankful smile as he reached for the document. "Thanks Mags," he stated, falling back into his chair as he surveyed the paperwork around him, stifling a groan.

"I'm knocking off," she declared with a small smile as she walked over, leaning against his desk. "I was going to see if you wanted to have some dinner, but somehow I'm going to guess the answer is no," she stated as she looked at his tired eyes. He gave an exasperated sigh as he stared at the files. "I've fallen a bit behind," he admitted and she gave a small smirk although she remained silent.

"Yes, I'm sure you have a whole new stack after today," she commented, a slight tinge of irritation in her voice and he gave her a pointed look in return.

"I was doing my job," he responded sharply, not wanting to get into a disagreement over work.

"I know but I just think-" she started, but was cut off at his large sigh.

"Don't Mags," he warned irritably, running his fingers across his eyes as his tired gaze fell upon her. "I know how you feel, but this was a professional decision to do with a CI matter. I don't want to talk about it anymore, I just want to spend a quick five minutes with my girlfriend before I have to get back to another stack load of papers."

She gave a resigned nod in response, knowing he was right. 'Them' had to be separated from the job, it was the only way in which their relationship could last two police force careers.

"I'm sorry," she stated honestly and he gave a small nod in acceptance, letting the subject drop. She gave him a small smile, indicating to the paperwork surrounding his desk. "Why don't I stay?" she offered with a smile, indicating to one of the large stacks.

His eyebrows rose at her suggestion, eyeing her disbelievingly "You really want to do my paperwork?" he asked curiously and she shook her head in response, her features displaying her amusement. "No," she replied with teasingly "I'm going to do my paperwork," she stated emphasizing the word 'my.' "But I will keep you company," she finished and he gave a small chuckle in response as he nodded.

"As much as I would love it," he declared with a smile, walking around the desk to rest his hands upon her shoulders, leaning in close. "It would take me twice as long," he finished knowingly, placing a small peck against her lips as he leant against the desk.

She tiled her head in contemplation, staring up at him with an amused smirk "You can't stay focused?" she asked innocently and he chuckled in response as his hands fell to her hips, nudging her closer.

"Not when I'm doing something I don't want to do…and you're there and I start thinking about all the better ways to spend my time," he whispered into her ear, voice husky as he placed a soft kiss against her temple. He smiled in self-satisfaction when he felt her shiver in response. She blushed slightly, not needing to see his face to see the smug smile.

"Well then I'll leave you to it," she stated with a regretful sigh, placing a quick peck on his lips as she turned to move out of his embrace. She halted however, as his grip remained on her arm and she turned, eyebrows rising in question as she took in his puppy dog expression.

"I don't need to do paperwork tonight," he stated offhandedly with a shrug, tugging gently at her arm. She laughed at his antics, shaking her head in response as she wriggled her hand free. "Those stacks of paperwork seem to suggest the contrary," she replied with a tinge of regret, knowing that the paperwork would have to be due soon for him to voluntarily tackle the pile. He sighed in acknowledgment, as he slowly made his way around the desk, sinking into his chair with a thud.

Her fingers were barely around the doorknob when his voice suddenly stopped her.

"Hey, Mags," he mused, head resting on his palm as he stared at her tiredly. "What was it about the case that had you so riled up?" he asked, a spark of curiosity in his eyes as he watched her give a self-conscious shrug.

"I just don't think a drawn out court process is going to help," she replied, meeting his gaze. "She's just a kid who didn't have anyone else to turn to…she made a mistake but I don't think punishment is going to help," she replied, leaning against the door as she finished her speech.

"It seems more than that," he asserted, although his voice held no judgment only mere curiosity.

She gave a small shrug in response, crossing her arms in comfort as she contemplated his suggestion. The silence reigned for a few moments before she gave a small nod of admittance, exhaling slowly. "It reminds me of a case," she admitted, watching as his mind processed her words.

"One I know?" he asked and she shook her head, moving in to take the seat across from him.

"No," she admitted softly as she fiddled with a pen upon his desk, tapping it nervously as she met his gaze. "I was doing some volunteer work at a drop in centre a while back and some of the kids there, well this one girl…she really stuck with me," she confessed, trailing off as she became lost in the memory. He could not help but hear the tinge of regret in her voice.

"What happened to her?" he asked softly, feeling his heart constrict as she visibly flinched.

"She died."

He watched in silence as the emotions played across her features, needing a moment to compose herself before she continued. He reached across the desk, hand resting reassuringly over hers as she glanced towards him, giving him a grateful smile.

"She was mixed up with a bad crowd, and she got caught by the police. She was so scared about going to jail," she stated, taking a calming breath. "Theory goes that she tried to steal her boyfriend's drug money to skip town, he caught her and decided to teach her a lesson with a steel bar," she continued, remorse evident. "They switched off the life support four days later."

"I'm sorry," he stated simply, knowing that when it came to those kinds of cases, words would always be of little comfort. She gave a resigned nod, "Yeah, so was I," she admitted, meeting his gaze. "It's just sometimes I feel like we become so desensitized when we charge people that we don't really think about what it means to them," she finished, taking a breath. "I know I got fired up today, and I am sorry…it's just with the younger ones…it's just such a waste."

"Yeah, it often is," he agreed, his own mind flittering through the images of the young persons that came in and out of the door every day. The fourteen-year-old heroin addicts, the neglected, the angry, the abused, all such a waste of potential.

The silence remained for a few moments, before she tapped his arm softly, breaking his thoughts. He gave her a small smile, tilting his head, as he contemplated the situation. She gave a brief nod in encouragement, knowing what he was thinking.

"So this drop in centre," he started casually, although his eyes gave him away, "When were you volunteering?"

"I got involved almost a year before I came back here," she admitted softly, meeting his gaze as she leant back in the chair, making herself more comfortable. Relieved he had felt comfortable enough to dig a little further into their time apart.

"It sounds more like you," he commented with a smile and she gave a small nod, a smile gracing her features. "It was the first time since I left I actually thought I was doing something, helping someone," she replied, fondness in her voice. "I mean the cases are hard, but they're the ones that really need someone."

"I'm sure they're better for it," he replied with conviction, his fingers intertwining with hers across the desk. "Was that where you were when you came back?" he asked tentatively and she gave a small nod.

"For all intense and purposes," she confirmed, elaborating at his confused look. "I was living in Perth, which was where the drop in centre was-" she started but was cut off by PJ.

"Where you met Sandra also?" he asked, trying to piece together what she had told him. She gave a brief nod in confirmation, "Her brother was actually a guidance counselor at the centre."

"Her brother," he repeated, trying to hide his surprise. She tilted her head as she watched the emotions play across his features, "Sounds like a nice guy," he commented offhandedly, and if she didn't know him better, she would have missed the hidden jealously in his words.

"His wife seems to think so," she replied, feeling the need to reassure him, no matter how unfounded his presumption. His face contorted in guilt and she shook her head in response, understanding his reaction. Knowing what it was like to not be in someone life and to hear about the people who had been.

"When witness contacted me, I left Perth and I had a couple week hiatus, I guess you could say, before I met you in Melbourne," she admitted, smiling as his thumb continued to trace soothing circles across her hand.

"So they were the ones you had to finish things up with before you came back," he stated and she gave a brief nod, a small smile forming on her face. "They are good people, I actually miss them more than I thought I would," she stated with a smile before it dropped, as she looked at him concerned. "I don't mean that I don't want to be here-" she started but was silenced as PJ instantly raised his hand to stop her.

"Come on Mags, we're past that," he stated with a grin, meeting her eyes. "You don't have to watch what you say, I just want to know," he replied softly.

She nodded in acceptance before frowning as she glanced at her watch. "Well if you actually want to get any paper work done, I better get going," she stated with a resigned sigh and he groaned at the mention of the 'P' word.

"Told you, you would distract me," he asserted and she sniggered in response as she rose from the chair, tossing a blue packaging out of her pocket. "That should make up for it," she commented offhandedly leaning forward to place a quick peck on his lips as she made her way towards the door. "Give me a call if you finish before eleven," she stated softly before opening the door and making her way out.

He sighed in resignation as he watched her go, before picking up the blue packaged object and smiling in fondness as he tore the wrapping. He picked up his pen as he glanced at the first file, biting into the chocolate Freddo with appreciation.


	16. Part 2: Chapter 11

Author's Note : This is the last piece that I had partially saved, so anything from now on besides the last chapters will have to be written. This takes much longer so installments will not be frequent from this point. Please enjoy and feedback is always welcomed.

**Chapter 2: Part 11**

She allowed a small smile to grace her features as she closed her bedroom door behind her. PJ looked up from his place on the bed and they both shared a grin as she slowly stepped towards him. He rose, striding towards her and scooping her tiny frame up into his arms as he kissed her passionately, gently maneuvering her across the bed as he hovered inches above her, never breaking contact. She arched into him as his fingers skimmed her body, his tongue massaging hers as she lifted a leg to encircle his waist.

"I love you," she whispered as she broke apart from him, taking a minute to catch her breath as she stared into his blue eyes, dark with desire.

"I love you," he admitted softly, his fingers gently cupping her face as he gently reclaimed her lips with his own. She tugged at his shirt as he reluctantly broke away from her, allowing the garment to slide over his head as he rolled them, her tiny frame resting upon his.

Both cursed at the knock on the door.

"They'll go away," PJ murmured into her ear as he recaptured her lips. She melted into the kiss, falling back against him as he began to unbutton her shirt.

The knocking persisted.

"Who is it?" Maggie yelled out slightly exasperated as she continued to lie against him, his fingers tracing a lazy pattern across her back.

"Does Maggie live here?" a small voice asked and even through the large wooden door she recognized it immediately.

"Get dressed," she hissed as she rolled, maneuvering herself into a sitting position as she struggled to re-do the buttons on her shirt. PJ stared dumbly at the empty space she had just occupied, his brain unable to comprehend the sudden shift.

"You have to be kidding," he finally muttered, not needing to turn to see the scowl plastered across her face. He sighed deeply as he reluctantly trailed his arm across the ground to locate his shirt.

"PJ sit on the chair," she whispered, voice low, as she smoothed down her hair. He shook his head in response, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Give me a minute," he retorted and she felt herself cough to hide the snigger forming at his expression.

Without another word, she swung the door open, smiling when the petite girl smiled up at her, her blue eyes shining with disbelief.

"It is you!" she exclaimed happily, feeling the girl's arms instantly encircle her and she smiled as she hugged her tighter.

"Emma!" an irritated voice barked from the hallway and both turned to see the cross face of Ben Stewart storming towards them.

Her eyes travelled between father and daughter and from the guilty look on his daughter's face, she knew he had warned her not to come up. He shot a regretful look towards her as he took in her ruffled appearance and she felt herself blush, knowing that while the thirteen year old girl had no idea what she had just interrupted, her father sure did.

"It's ok Ben," she stated with a smile, eyes falling on Emma who was positively beaming. "I've been waiting for you to bring this girl down to see me," she replied light hearted as she swung an arm protectively around her.

"I told you she would be happy to see me," Emma cried triumphantly as she leaned against Maggie, however Ben was not buying his daughter's act and he knew that PJ was probably not appreciating the interruption.

"Say goodnight Emma it's late," he stated, his eyes demanding as he eyed his daughter warningly. "You can come to the station tomorrow," he stated, giving her a compromise, knowing how much Maggie meant to her.

"Can't I stay just this once?" she wined, sending her father a pleading look as she glanced at Maggie for support. Maggie opened her mouth to speak, stopping to look to Ben for advice.

"No Emma we have talked about this," he replied warningly, his tone indicating no room for argument. He casted his eyes sheepishly to Maggie, "I'm so sorry," he stated apologetically.

"It's fine Ben, it's good to see her," she replied with a smile, moving Emma into her embrace as she turned to the beaming girl.

Emma sent her father another pleading look but sighed as he indicated sharply to the hallway. Her unhappiness evident, she regretfully turned to Maggie. "I have to go," she wined as she shot an unhappy glare towards her father, which he ignored.

"We'll have more time tomorrow," Maggie stated soothingly, giving Emma one last hug before Ben took her hand.

"I've missed you," she stated, a small amount of sadness in her voice and Maggie nodded as she stroked her hair soothingly, "I've missed you too," she stated with a smile. "We have a lot of catching up to do," she finished as she watched the grin break across her features.

She could hear Ben begin his lecture on manners as the pair descended the stairs. She let out a small smile as she watched them descend before turning back to her room, closing the door behind her.

PJ's head snapped up at her sudden reappearance and she gave him a smile as she took a seat next to him on the bed.

"Emma," she explained simply and he gave a small nod in acknowledgment. "I heard," he replied as she leant against him, letting out a tired sigh.

"She's gotten so much bigger," she mused, her tone contemplative as she rested her head on his shoulder. "I almost wouldn't have recognized her," she stated in disbelief.

"Ten to thirteen is a big difference," he conceded reaching up to stroke her hair as she continued to stare into the distance. He watched her out the corner of his eye, curious to what was running through her mind.

"It seems like a long time," she stated softly, his fingers intertwining with hers, sensing her need for comfort. "Some days I think nothing has changed, and then something comes up and it hits me," she stated softly, her words echoing in the silent room.

He shifted at her words, moving her head off his shoulder as he gently cupped her face, meeting her gaze. "Things are always changing Mags," he stated softly as he stroked her cheek with his thumb.

"I feel like I've lost so much time," she stated, voice thick with emotion as she met his eyes. "I feel like I'm missing it," she finished, her voice trembling slightly as her eyes became moist and she blinked, trying to retain some control.

He frowned at her distress, not quite comprehending her meaning. "Missing what?" he asked softly, trying to offer some support. He bit back his frustration when she simply shook her head, moving slightly out of his grasp.

"Same old thing," she replied dismissively, taking a deep breath to calm herself. She gave him a small grin as she placed a hand upon his shoulder, rising upon her knees. "Now where were we?" she asked huskily as she began to slide her other hand along his chest.

He took a sharp intake of breath in response to her touch, his mind instantly going blank as her hand traveled across his taught muscles, her lips descending softly upon his. He let out a groan as she shifted her body closer, his own arms encircling her waist to pull her against him, deepening the kiss. She pulled back, out of breath as she rested her forehead against his, fingers tugging at his shirt.

"You are wearing too many clothes," she mumbled softly as she placed another gentle kiss against his lips, continuing to tug at the shirt.

"Maggie," he managed in response as he tried to calm his racing pulse. He pulled her into his lap, his hands resting lightly on her hips. "I still want to know," he prodded, stifling a moan as she began to trail her lips across his neck.

"Mmm…later," she replied in between kisses and he closed his eyes attempting to retain some control. Unfortunately, her affect on him had not diminished over the years, if anything it had gotten stronger.

"Later," he agreed as he hungrily moved his lips back towards hers, laying them gently backward upon the bed.

He stifled a groan when the silence was again interrupted by a thumping at the door.

"Ignore it," he growled as he felt her go still beneath him. She broke apart from him slightly, glancing towards the door before meeting his eyes, obviously torn.

The knocking persisted and he cursed in annoyance as he bowed his head, rolling off her in resignation. She sent him an apologetic glance, quickly placing a soft kiss on his cheek, before maneuvering herself off the bed and towards the door. One night, she thought to herself irritably, what did she have to do to get just one night?

"Who is it?" she called as she reached the door, wishing for the hundredth time since she had moved that Chris would install a peephole in the doors. Three years on witness had made her significantly edgy about opening doors when she could not identify who was on the other side.

"Maggie love, it's Leila," the older woman called through the door and Maggie exhaled in response, knowing that the chances of this being a quick visit had diminished significantly. She could see PJ's agonized expression as she opened the door.

"Leila, Hi," she greeted, leaning against the doorframe expectantly. "What can I do for you?" she asked.

"Oh how is it going love?" Leila responded in greeting, ignoring the social cues as she maneuvered past Maggie and into the room. "I brought you some of the jam from the new crop I was telling you about," she stated with a smile, before stopping when she caught sight of PJ.

"Leila," PJ greeted with a somewhat forced smile as he watched the older woman's eyes narrow. He felt his stomach clench as her lip curved upward.

"Detective," the older woman greeted with a sickly sweet tone as she glanced between the two of them, the rumors clearly circulating in her head. Maggie bit her tongue as she attempted to quell her annoyance. She knew the whole town had been speculating on the specifics of her relationship with PJ, and from the twinkle in Leila's eye, she knew this story would be circulating the retirement home at morning tea.

"It was very nice of you to offer me that jar," Maggie finally stated, trying to quell the uneasy silence as Leila's gaze continued to flitter between them. She cursed inwardly when she saw PJ's muscles tense, knowing he hated having his private life on display. Hated people prying into his business.

"Oh yes, wonderful strawberries this year," Leila commented offhandedly as Maggie politely reached for the jar. Leila shuffled slightly out of her grasp, obviously biding time, as she continued to eye them knowingly.

"Did you hear about the wedding announcement?" Leila asked, glancing between the two of them to which she received a pair of shaking heads. Maggie felt her irritation rise as Leila began to launch into a commentary about a friend of a friend who was now engaged to her high school sweetheart after a few years of separation. The resemblance between their situations was uncannily similar Maggie mused. What a coincidence, she added sarcastically as she watched PJ grind his teeth in annoyance. She could feel the irritation radiating from him as he listened to Leila's tale.

"You know the circumstances are not much different," she commented with a smile, indicating between the two of them.

"Really?" Maggie replied feigning shock as she took a deep breath trying to calm herself.

The scene was interrupted and the familiar sound of knocking and Maggie sighed in exasperation before shaking her head and yanking open the door, not caring who was on the other side.

"Merv," she announced perplexed and somewhat relieved as she took in the large man standing before her.

"Chris told me which room was yours, I came to get Leila," he stated, to which Maggie nodded as she indicated sharply behind her. "She's here," she confirmed, her usual politeness thinning somewhat at the night's events.

"Leila," Maggie called, as the older woman turned to face her. "Merv is here," she indicated with her head as she wondered over to the older woman, grabbing the jar from her hand as she did so. Leila looked up at Maggie surprised as she was effectively led towards the door, Maggie shepherding her with her small frame.

"I'm sure the jam will be lovely, thank you so much," she stated sincerely, smiling as Merv laced a hand around Leila as she entered the hallway. "I will see you both soon, have a good night" she commented, not bothering to wait for a reply before firmly shutting the door. She exhaled deeply as she leant against the closed door, sinking slowly to the ground in exhaustion. She stole a glance towards PJ who remained stoic on the other side of the room, arms defensively crossed.

"Bit of a mood killer," she commented with a small smile and frowned as he gave a single nod in agreement, his expression remaining fixed. She felt a small amount of guilt tug at his obvious unease and she sighed, meeting his gaze. "I'm sorry about all of that," she commented, taking a deep breath, her own mind trying to comprehend the night's events.

"It's not your fault," he replied tersely before exhaling slowly, crossing the distance between them.

She shrugged her shoulders, feeling the guilt invade her chest once more. "I know you've had to put up with a lot since I came back," she admitted meekly, diverting her gaze as she tried to order her thoughts.

"I don't care about the town," he reassured her automatically, placing his hands softly upon her shoulders to gain her full attention. "All I care about is us," he added with a small smile leaning forward to place a lingering kiss on her lips. She felt her body automatically respond as she leant closer into his warmth, resting her head upon his chest as he wrapped his arms around her.

"You still hate being the public gossip," she stated knowingly and he gave a resigned sigh as she felt him nod. "Yeah, I do," he admitted, squeezing her fractionally tighter "But this town gets bored quickly," he added, a small amount of hope in his voice.

"By tomorrow this story is going to be so distorted," she mumbled into his chest and she felt his body shake as he let out a small chuckle. "Yes, I would have been half naked with the lights dimmed," he replied and Maggie smiled in response. "No," she commented with a smirk, "Knowing Leila, I would have answered the door in my dressing gown while you lay across the bed, sheet draped across your waist."

He let out a genuine laugh at her scenario before leaning and whispering in her ear. "Fifteen minutes later and the story could have been true," he whispered suggestively and Maggie felt herself blush as she titled her head up to meet his gaze.

"I don't understand, I mean we're not hiding anything," she mumbled tiredly. "What is it people are so interested in?"

"I think they want a wedding," he replied softly. Her head tilted to meet his gaze, a small frown forming on her features.

"Oh," was all she managed as she gave him a small smile, breaking apart from him slightly. He knew her well enough, however, to differentiate her forced smiles from the genuine.

"Mags?" he asked softly, as he felt her withdraw. "Come on," he prompted softly, his tone urging her to trust him. She let out a sigh in recognition.

"I just," she started before faltering, trying to order her thoughts. He nudged her slightly closer in comfort and she smiled at the gesture before turning to meet his eyes. "I've just missed things," she admitted, giving him a small smile as he continued to watch her, waiting for her to elaborate. "And I think back to before and where I thought I'd be and sometimes it's just gets to me a little," she declared softly, struggling to keep her voice even.

"You thought we would be married by now," he stated knowingly and she sighed in response, looking up to meet his gaze.

"I'm not asking for a marriage proposal," she stated clearly, holding his gaze to emphasize her point. "Not now, but back then…in three years time…I had plans…" she stated unable to finish the thought as she felt the regret slam into her heart.

"You haven't thought about marriage since you've been back?" he asked, voice calm as his eyes searched hers, looking for an answer.

"I have," she stated softly, somewhat self-conscious at the admission as she casted him a nervous smile. "All I meant was back three years ago I thought we would be married by now. I thought we would have a house and a dog with a big backyard and the 2.5 kids -" she started but was cut off by PJ.

"Kids," he repeated softly, his attention solely focused on her as he watched her shuffle underneath his gaze. "That's what you meant before, with Emma," he stated, pieces slowly clicking into place. She refused to meet his eyes, but he remained silent, needing to hear her speak.

She gave a resigned sigh as she glanced briefly towards him, taking a deep breath as she stared up at the ceiling, trying to pick her words carefully.

"Yeah," she admitted, feeling her heart pound as she expelled the words into the air. "I know we never talked about it, there was never any time…but back then, I thought…" she finished unsure of the words. She diverted her gaze from his, studying her feet for a few seconds before hesitantly glancing towards him, needing to know his reaction.

"So did I," he replied softly, his voice unable to mask his own pain and she turned to him surprised by the admission. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it, knowing that there were no words. It was just life, another thing they had missed, another result of their separation. She moved to him and felt his arms engulf her pulling her tightly towards him as he rested his cheek upon her head, stroking her softly.

She was silent for a few moments and he could feel her jaw moving against his chest as she struggled with her words before inhaling deeply, having finally mustered the courage.

"And now?" she asked softly.

"I still want my life to be with you," he whispered and she gave a small nod against him.

"But the other stuff," she stated, knowing that the topic would not be revisited any time soon. "Do you still want that?" she asked, her pitch an octave higher than intended.

He shifted back slightly, raising his hand to tilt her chin up so he could catch her eye, his lips twitching as he contemplated his words. "I think we would have to have a serious talk about it," he admitted with a small smile, trying to reassure her.

She gave a small nod, trying to steady herself before asking the question plaguing her mind. She locked his gaze, trying to keep her voice clear and steady as she spoke. "A talk about when we should?" she asked, her voice faltering slightly. She felt her heart leap into her throat as she refused to break her eyes from him. She had to know.

"Do you want kids relatively soon?" he countered softly, moving back from her as he answered her question with one of his own. She folded her arms somewhat uncomfortably before giving a slight nod. "Yes," she confirmed, meeting his gaze, waiting for him to speak. She had never felt so exposed in her life.

He noted her trembling hands and he reached out for her, gripping her wrists softly as he pulled her back into his embrace. "So do I," he whispered into her ear as he tried to ease her distress. "It's just an issue of timing," he stated soothingly as he felt her relax into his arms, before wrapping herself around him as he hugged her tight.

He opened his mouth to speak but promptly closed it as he felt her lips graze the skin of his temple. He titled his head slowly to the right, giving her access to his lips as she captured his mouth with her own, fingers running down his chest before resting on his hips. He leaned further towards her, pushing her body up against his as he staggered a few steps before finding the fridge for support.

She broke apart from him briefly, as she gasped in some air "Now's….a good time to practice," she commented between breaths and he smirked in response, drawing her back into a heated kiss. "Definitely," he muttered as he began tugging at her shirt, lips dragging against hers hungrily.

"Not that you need the practice," she murmured as he dipped his head, making her gasp as he tendered to the side of her neck. She felt him chuckle, his breath warm as she felt a shiver race down her spine in anticipation.

"Door locked?" he whispered against her ear and she gave a sharp nod, not trusting her brain to form words. She felt him smile against her neck as he gently reclaimed her lips in a slow sensual kiss, walking her backward towards the bed.

"Hang on..." he murmured softly, as he broke from her. She stared at him, perplexed, as he moved to the side table, moving his arm behind the furniture before pulling down sharply. She stared at him dumbfounded as he reclosed the distance. She maneuvered slightly out from his grasp, eyeing him questioningly and he gave her a sheepish grin in response, "Phone line," he supplied. She smirked in response before recapturing his lips, intending to finally finish what they had started.


	17. Part 2: Chapter 12

**Author's Notes**: I'm going to be posting in quick succession but I would like to know what you thought of each part. Please review, as you read as a bit of feedback goes a long way.

**Part 2: Chapter 12  
**

Maggie and PJ both reentered the station, having finished taking statements and investigating the latest burglary to hit the streets of Mount Thomas. Maggie barley had a moment to hang up her hat and keys before the Boss' door jerked open.

"PJ, Doyle, my office," he motioned, his tone professional but demanding.

Maggie shot a quick look over at PJ, giving him a look of 'what did you do.' PJ shrugged his shoulders in reply, taking the lead into the office. Dash, Ben and Jack watched silently as the door clicked closed behind their colleagues, eyeing each other to gain any information. At the blank faces around the station, all three turned their attention back to the door suspiciously.

Maggie shut the door softly behind her and took a seat across from the Boss. PJ was beside her, posture relaxed and Maggie took a deep breath in order to calm herself, this was probably just a case reassignment she told herself. When Tom Croydon finally looked up at her, she felt her stomach clench. From the look in his eye, she knew that this would not be about a simple case.

He was silent for a moment, his posture pensive as he eyed his two officers. When he spoke, his voice was calm. "Were either of you aware of the threats made against Peter Grantham since his release from prison three days ago?" he finally asked.

Maggie felt the air expel from her lungs, her mind reeling as she tried to place the name, her abdomen clenching as she felt PJ tense beside her. He did not allow himself to show a flicker of recognition. "No Boss," he responded, voice remaining tightly controlled.

"I had to ask," he replied narrowing his eyes towards the detective "Don't even think about getting involved PJ," he warned. PJ met the Boss' gaze in silent confrontation.

"I'm sure he's blackballed on many people lists, anybody could have made those threats" PJ supplied, remaining impassive.

Tom leant further across the desk, warning evident in his posture and tone. "This guy had it in for you PJ" he stated, voice lowering in control "Someone is going to come knocking and you need to be completely clean."

He sat there in silence, eyeing the Boss, his posture having changed from one of ignorance to defensiveness. His jaw was clenched, his eyes narrowed in defiance and Maggie shifted uncomfortably in her seat, watching the battle between them. Tom broke his staring battle with PJ, diverting his gaze to his Senior Constable

"Doyle" he stated forcefully and Maggie's head slowly rose to attention.

"If he's looking to get back at PJ you may want to keep an eye out," he warned and she gave a slight nod before meeting his gaze, her eyes widening as her memory finally recalled the situation.

"Do you think he would bother coming back here?" she asked, as she eyed the two men.

PJ let out a sigh before turning his gaze towards her "Yeah," he confirmed. "It's a possibility," he finished a small tinge of regret in his voice.

"It's a long time to hold a grudge," she commented as she took a deep breath, focusing upon him "I mean he hasn't been your Boss in over a decade…maybe he just-"

"Forgot I lost him his job and that you gave the evidence which put him away for the past six years," PJ finished for her, his brows rising in disbelief as he met her gaze. "He's already tried to set me up once, there is no telling what he may do," he admitted irritably turning back towards the Boss.

Tom nodded in response, his voice softening somewhat when he spoke "He is on strict parole conditions and his know associates are currently doing time also. But we don't know what Grantham is going to do and I don't want ESD to come knocking." He stated eyeing his two officers "Whether or not he decides to come to Mt Thomas I want you both on the lookout and I suggest that neither of you give anyone a reason to doubt your police capabilities," he finished, taking a breath.

"Yes Boss" PJ replied as did Maggie as he stood, striding towards the door, Maggie following behind.

"And for god sake be careful," he muttered as he watched the pair exit his office.

Maggie flicked on her bedside lamp later that night as she watched PJ shuffle back to her bed, loosely draped in a sheet. He passed her the spoons and the vanilla-chocolate-swirl tub of ice cream. She lifted the lid off greedily as he slipped back into bed, propping himself up on the pillows before she leant back into his chest, licking the ice cream as it began to melt on the spoon. He reached over, digging his spoon into the desert letting a content smile overtake his face.

"Doesn't get much better than this," he commented as he placed a small peck on her cheek, leaving a creamy mark as he dipped his spoon back into the ice-cream. She gave him a smile before subtly wiping the sticky moisture off her cheek as she leant back into his embrace.

"You should consider yourself lucky, this is the last thing in my fridge," she pointed out with a smile before she paused in thought. "Unless you want a slice of beetroot with some wheat crackers," she amended looking at him expectantly.

His face contorted as he considered her offer, before firmly shaking his head as he scooped another mouthful from the container. "Does this mean the ice-cream is substituting dinner?" he asked and she gave a small shrug of her shoulders.

"We can go downstairs," she supplied and he shook his head in response. She frowned, slightly curious as she met his eye "Have something against Chris' steak and chips?" she asked genuinely puzzled and he let out a small huff in response. "Nope, just the company downstairs," he retorted snidely, his patience at the towns interest in his love life in the last few months having reached breaking point.

She reached up, brushing her lips across his teasingly as he let out a groan, pulling her against him as he covered his mouth with hers. She felt herself lean into his warmth, the faintest taste of chocolate on his lips before she slowly pulled back, placing a parting peck on his lips.

"We're not that interesting, they'll move on to the next scandal" she stated softly as she met his eyes, her fingers resting reassuringly on his wrist as she leaned back into his chest, reaching for the tub.

"Just wish people would mind their own business," he replied bluntly, leaning forward as he took another scoop of ice cream. "In Mt Thomas?' Maggie replied, voice rising in disbelief and she heard him grunt in agreement.

"PJ," she stated softly as the silence fell, running her spoon slowly through the tub, watching the ice cream part as her mind contemplated the events of the day. He looked over to her expectantly and she forced a tight smile "This Grantham thing," she started, her voice quivering slightly as she looked into his eyes. "You're not going to get involved are you?" she asked apprehensively.

"I don't want to," he responded automatically, reaching up to stroke her cheek. "And if he stays out of Mt Thomas I won't have to" he added, taking a deep breath, giving her a forced smile.

"But" she started taking a deep breath, trying to form the words as she turned to face him, remorse in her eyes. "He was a crooked cop PJ and he has it in for you. If he's connected to something…" she trailed off taking a deep breath, her eyes becoming slightly moist as she diverted her gaze.

"Mags," he prompted concerned as he watched the display of emotions cross her features, reaching out towards her only to have her move from his grasp as she finally re-met his eye.

"What if he's connected to someone PJ? What if…what if someone makes the connection to you, to us?" she asked softly, her voice trembling with emotion as she stared at him wide eyed and he felt his heart constrict at the spark of fear he saw in her eyes.

"Mags," he tried again obviously perplexed as he gently encircled her wrist, tugging her closer as he attempted to close the distance. "Every district would be watching Grantham" he stated gently, eyes boring into hers. "He's also on parole, it would be almost impossible for him to try anything," he stated firmly, concern rising as he watched the fear continue to reflect in her eyes. "What is it?" he asked softly, reaching up to lightly grazing his fingers along her cheek.

"One phone call PJ, that's all it takes, one phone call to someone connected and it doesn't matter who's watching that person can still end up dead," she stated adamantly, voice hollow and raw. He took a sharp intake of breath as he watched her eyes cloud over at the statement and he knew her words held a ring of experience within them. He could hear his heart thudding in his chest.

He reached out for her in support and bit back his frustration when she simply shook her head, moving slightly out of his grasp. "You're probably right," she commented dismissively, taking a deep breath to calm herself before tossing the covers away and climbing out of bed.

"Maggie," he called firmly, as he silently cursed as he too tossed off the covers. He propelled himself out of bed as she began shrugging on the jacket she had been wearing earlier.

"Mags," he tried again, taking a few tentative steps forward as he stilled her wrist, slowly closing the distance she had created.

"Talk to me," he stated softly, voice raw with emotion. The anguish in his voice finally stopped her as she met his gaze, concerned. He watched the tear begin to trickle down her cheek and he pulled her into his embrace.

PJ breathed in the scent of her hair as he held her, her face snuggled against his chest as he heard her gasp for breath, her hands clutching his shirt as he held her tightly. He had pulled them down to the bed and she had crawled into his lap, his arms strongly cradling her as he shushed her gently.

He gave her a small kiss on the top of her head, listening as her breathing began to calm and he felt her shuffle against him, muscles cramping from the strain of remaining in one position. Slowly she pulled her head back, meeting his eyes as she wiped her tear stained cheeks, giving him a shaky smile as she rolled over towards her side of the bed, reaching for the tissues.

"Maggie," he stated softly, his voice echoing in the silence of the bedroom as he heard her give a shaky breath in response. She peered over her shoulder to meet his eyes, the bedside lamp sending a comforting glow through the room. She could see the concern written on his face and she shuffled slightly, moving back into his grasp as he protectively swung an arm around her waist, propping himself up so he could see her more clearly.

He waited, and she diverted her eyes trying to find the words.

"You don't have to explain," he offered gently as she continued to stare at the sheets and she felt her heart lurch at his statement. She knew how much her detective thrived on facts and answers, how much he hated uncertainty.

"I just…" she hiccupped trying to regulate her breathing, as she turned to him. "God, this has got to be the worst overreaction ever," she chastised herself as she reached over grabbing another tissue from the box on the nightstand.

"Mags," he stated knowingly, refusing to believe her reaction had to do with Grantham at all.

She took a deep breath, forcing the air in and out of her lungs as she turned her red-rimmed eyes towards him.

"I know this Grantham thing…I know that even if he does come back…that the threat," she started, taking a moment before continuing. "I know the threat is minimal. My head knows that" she stated with a hint of frustration.

"Then what is it…" he probed, waiting for her to find the words.

"I just…" she began, shaking her head as she trailed off. "I'm...normally…during the day I'm fine, I'm in control...and with you at night, I'm normally fine…I don't know what's wrong with me," she muttered more to herself then to him.

PJ felt the concern grip his chest as he took in a deep breath, turning to her.

"What about when I'm not here," he asked softly, having noticed her unspoken words. He watched as she froze, eyes widening in realization of her slip.

She opened her mouth to speak but closed it as she met his eyes and he felt his heart break as he took in her tear stained cheeks. Never had she looked more vulnerable.

He closed his eyes as his mind dealt with the new realization. God, how could he not have noticed?

She cursed herself inwardly as she watched the guilt travel across his features.

"PJ," she stated softly but he shook his head, snapping himself out of his thought and redirecting his attention back to her. He forced her a comforting smile, as he gently encircled her waist, bring her back towards him, as he slung his other arm over her side, wrapping her tightly in his embrace. She snuggled into his warmth, his arms protecting her from the world.

He placed a small kiss on her cheek, waiting patiently as she struggled to find the words.

"I just..." she began, feeling the emotion choke her once more as she tried to explain her behavior. "I just," she started again, exhaling loudly as she tried to order her thoughts. "I spent the last three years of my life with people trying to kill me," she declared softly, her voice trembling as she spoke. She did not even bother to hide the fear as she took a deep breath, the tears streaming freely down her face. "I was alone and I was scared. I had never been so alone…" she muttered, her voice trailing off as her entire body began to shake, the repent stress of three years finally able to spill out.

"It's okay," he whispered gently, rubbing soothing circle across her back as the sobs began to rack her small frame as she clutched at his chest. "You're not alone anymore, you don't have to be strong, you can fall apart," he whispered knowingly. He closed his eyes, trying to draw from his own strength as her sobs echoed off the walls. Three years he thought to himself as he bit his lips trying to control his own emotions, three years that she had no one to fall back on. Three years of having to survive.

"You're safe," he whispered and he felt her shake her head against his chest in response, trying to gain control of her breathing as she finally met his gaze. "That's what I keep telling myself," she replied, her voice thick as the lone tear was accompanied by another. He looked at her red-rimmed eyes and drew her back into his embrace. She allowed him to, resting her forehead against his chest as he listened to her labored breathing slowly return to normal.

"You know I had a security scare when I was on witness," she stammered, feeling a slight sense of panic as she reencountered the memory.

He gave a small nod in response, diverting his eyes from her momentarily. She didn't need to know that this 'security scare' had kept him up on endless nights, didn't need to know that the fact that she had waited so long to tell him made him more frightened then she could imagine. He took a deep breath, she needed his strength and he was not going to back away from her now.

"I…I…can't remember much," she stammered, trying to get it out as she broke her gaze from his. If she had to look into his hurting eyes as she recounted the event she knew she would never finish.

"Maggie you don't have to do this," he stated softly but she shook her head as she met his gaze. He looked into her wide green eyes and gave a small nod, knowing she wanted to tell him, needed to tell him, while she still had the strength to.

"It comes back in bits and pieces in dreams…I wake up shaking….afterward I can't recall…" she continued, trying to calm her breathing which had become noticeably shallower. She fell silent for a moment, struggling to control the emotions raging through her tiny body.

"Maggie," he gently began but she shook her head, knowing he was attempting to protect her. She felt him lean back against the pillows in acquiescence and she took a deep breath trying to form the words.

"All I know was that I came home….and something felt odd…but I didn't know…everything looked the same, I didn't think anything had been moved...But I remember being unnerved," she gulped, her breath hitching on the words.

She fell silent, and he felt his heart stopped beating as he gently tightened his grip, letting her know he was there. He could feel her hands shaking and he almost wished she would not tell him.

It seemed an eternity before she continued.

"I moved into my bedroom and I looked up into my mirror and I saw this flash," she continued cryptically, her voice no longer able to hide the sense of panic.

"The next clear memory I have is that I'm in a hospital…and I'm in pain…a lot of pain," she stated softly as she glanced towards the ceiling in a desperate attempt to stop the tears from overflowing. "I wake up and a few minutes later there is a guy in a suit. He tells me I'm lucky," she states, the bitterness evident as she spat the last two words.

"They sent someone to finish me, they knew who I was," she stated softly, her voice contort with emotion. "One bullet. It was supposed to be straight through the heart…apparently whoever it was, was a little crooked sighted…" she joked, but the humor was cold.

"I couldn't be alone for a long time after that, every flash of sunlight, every person, every room…I just knew it could be anytime and I would never see it coming," she stated softly. She was not at all surprised when she felt herself being crushed against him, her head resting on his chest as she allowed herself to fall against him.

"I had to leave, I had to start over, I spent months in health facilities healing and rehabilitation and I remember being there and thinking why?" she admitted softly, the tears once again beginning to trickle down her cheeks as the story flowed from her lips. "I had lost you, everyone in Mt Thomas, I had just lost the new life I had been creating…to move again until what? They hunt me down again and actually finish the job." She finished, her sobs escaping as she leant against him.

"You're safe," he whispered softly as she cried into his shirt and she shook her head, not quite willing to accept it. "You don't know that," she whispered softly, as she leaned back to meet him in the eye.

"Maggie," he replied softly, trying to pacify her as he lent forward brushing his thumb across her damp cheeks, trying to offer her any sense of comfort. "You are safe here Maggie, this is your home," he repeated more forcefully, an apparent certainty in his voice.

"You can't know that," she murmured with a small frown, feeling the surge of panic gently decrease as she lay in his embrace.

He shook his head, but she placed a gentle finger over his lips, knowing she needed to say the words. It was time to voice the issue they had been avoiding since the day of her return. She met his eye, trying to pick her words carefully, although knowing that would not ease their impact. Denial was the best protection mechanism, and it hurt like hell when it was shattered.

"The truth is," she started, her eyes interlocked with his as she continued.

"Someone out there wants me dead and the only reason why I'm alive is because they have better things to do than hunt me down," she admitted softly, knowing that somewhere he knew the truth of her words.

"No," he stated adamantly, growing more defiant as he stared at her, rising so that they were face to face. "You don't have to run anymore Maggie," he added soothingly as he cupped her cheek, wiping away a stray near as she leaned into his touch.

"I'm not," she replied as she reached forward placing a small peck on his lips, trying to offer him comfort. She took a deep breath, trying to find the words to make him understand.

"It took me a long time to stop jumping at shadows, and a lot of counseling to resign myself to the fact that I can't live my life in fear of dying," she began, meeting his eyes as she took a deep breath, trying to ease the tightness in her chest. "If it happens, I'll never see it coming," she admitted softly, watching his eyes as he processed her words. "I had to accept that I was powerless and enjoy the time I had."

"Mags," he attempted to argue but his words fell flat as she shook her head in response.

"You know it too," she asserted, yanking away the straws he was attempting to clutch. "You said yourself that you were afraid the whole saga wasn't over."

PJ opened his mouth slightly shocked, cursing himself over his own paranoia.

"If I had known I-" he started in apology and she shook her head in response.

"You would have never admitted it?" she finished knowingly and he gave a reluctant nod of his head in response.

"It made me feel better knowing you thought that," she stated softly, resting her hand on his arm, as his head snapped towards her in surprise. "Look when I came back and you wanted time to figure things out, I was worried," she admitted with a small smile. "But when you told me that it was because you were afraid that everything wasn't over, that I would have to disappear again…it was reassuring to hear that my fears were shared…that you could really understand."

"I don't want to live without you again," he admitted his voice cracking at the thought. "I couldn't survive again, not now, not after this…" he stammered, his own eyes becoming moist as he broke his gaze from her, trying to quell the emotions. She felt her heart constrict at the anguish and pleading in his voice, a stark reminder that she had left him with baggage of his own.

She knew tonight was where the secrets had to end.

"It still scares me that my presence might cost you your life," she admitted, meeting his gaze as she felt her heart leap into her throat.

His eyes snapped to hers, "It scares the hell out of me that one day I might walk through the door and they would …" he trailed off unable to complete the thought.

"We'll never see it coming," she pointed out softly and he gave a resigned nod, his eyes flickering shut as he let her words wash over him.

"I know," he confirmed as he tightened his hold on her, his sorrow evident as he finally recognized the situation. "I know," he repeated, silently hating that she had popped the secure bubble that had surrounded them.

They let the silence wash over them, the facts of their situation more crystallized than ever.

"I knew it was a risk," he admitted softly, as he glanced towards her. "I knew when you came back, what it meant," he stated softly, looking at her knowingly. "I knew witness didn't just decide for you to come home…I know that doesn't happen…I know you went through a lot to be here."

"I never thought you really bought that," she admitted as she ran her fingers lightly across his chest in thought. "But I knew you would know the implications of my return, I just wanted to give you the option."

"Thank you," he whispered softly into her ear as she met his eyes, seeing the wealth of emotion glistening within. She tentatively reached up, cupping his cheek as she gently placed her lips over his, the kiss deep and comforting as they slowly broke apart, foreheads resting lightly as he met her eyes.

"If something happens," he whispered the words harsh even when spoken softly. "I want you to let me come with you," he demanded although she could recognize the pleading in his eyes.

She could barely manage a brief nod in response as she recaptured his lips, needing to feel him against her as the tears flowed freely down her face. "I promise," she whispered against his ear as she re-met his lips with her own as he clung to her.

He slowly broke their embrace, cupping her cheek as her eyes fell upon him. "Mags," he stated softly, waiting until he had her full attention. "If something happens to me," he started but was cut off with a 'ssshh' from Maggie.

"Don't say that," she asserted but he shook his head, wanting to finish. "Mags if your fear comes true and something happens I want you to know I knew what I was doing," he began, silencing her before she could interrupt. "I just want the rest of my life to be with you, no matter how long or how short that is," he stated softly giving her a brief smile, "It was worth it."

She shook her head in response, feeling the emotion overwhelm her. "I can't bury you," she admitted with a squeak and he gave her a small chuckle in response. "Well I'm sure as hell not letting you go first," he replied with a smile as he wiped away her tears.

"Let's fight over it in about forty years," she replied softly and he gave a small nod in response before he claimed her lips, letting out a small groan as she deepened the kiss.

"I love you," she whispered.


	18. Part 2: Chapter 13

**Author's Note**: Posting in succession but would still like some individual feedback on each piece. They are all quite different and would like some feedback on characterization as it was my main focus (since I know there are a few grammar/spelling mistakes)

**Part 2: Chapter 13**

"PJ what are we doing here," Maggie muttered irritably as she trudged up the hill behind him, slightly disorientated by their surroundings.

"We're almost there," he replied flippantly, pausing for her to catch up as he offered a hand, pulling her up the steep slope.

"When did you turn into a country man," she stated as she followed him "This wasn't exactly what I thought we would be doing on our day off," she added, sending him a confused look.

"And what exactly did you have in mind?" he asked with a smug smile and she rolled her eyes in response at his grin. "A warm bath alone" she retorted, emphasizing the word alone.

He let out a chuckle in response before he reached out an arm, halting her movement before turning to her. "We're here," he declared, a small smile tugging at his lips.

Maggie scoured the area noting they were in a clearance on top of a small incline. A few large rocks and pieces could be spotted and large trees all around. She frowned slightly with puzzlement as she looked at him expectantly.

"Where exactly is here?" she asked somewhat perplexed and he gave her a smirk in response, his voice teasing when he replied "Don't you remember?"

She frowned again, eyeing her surroundings. Something did seem oddly familiar, as if she had been there before but she could not quite place it. He watched as her mind continued to whirl, interested to see if she would be able to recall the memory. She glanced up at him still confused and he gave her a small grin as he took her hand, leading her over to a large rock that was to the side of the clearing.

She stared at him amused as she watched him push the rock before it slowly rolled from its place. She blinked surprised when she saw a small hole in the ground as she came over, staring down the hole before her eyes opened in realization, everything clicking into place.

"Oh" was all she managed as she turned to him, her eyes wide as she stared, trying to find the words.

"I had to take you the long way otherwise I knew you would recognize it," he started in explanation as he watched her continue to stare at him with bewilderment.

"Why are we here?" she asked softly meeting his gaze and he gave a small shrug as he led her over to a couple of adjacent rocks, indicating for her to take a seat "I wanted to be where it all began," he stated, trailing his fingers along her arm as she gave him a smile, eyeing the scenery.

"It's changed a bit over the years," she commented with a smile. "The scenery below, I'm sure, is still dank and dusty," she stated with a small amount of contempt in her voice.

"You know, never in my wildest dreams did I think I would ever be grateful to get stuck in a mine shaft," he stated with a small smile as he leant forward, capturing her lips gently in a kiss.

She smiled back giving a small nod. "Despite my extreme fear of enclosed spaces and being buried alive…I have to admit that it was worth it," she stated softly, reaching up to trail her fingers along his cheek.

"Did you think we would have gotten there otherwise?" he asked, curious as he watched her. She gave a small nod in return. "PJ we've made it through mine shafts, inquests, hospitalizations, witness…nothing can separate us," she stated reaching forward as she cover his mouth with hers, pulling him closer to her as she snaked an arm around his neck, before pulling back slightly as he placed another quick peck on her lips.

"That's what I thought to," he stated softly as he tried to calm his breathing, meeting her eyes as he cupped both her hands in his.

"I love you Maggie, I love you even more than I did that day in the mine shaft which I never thought was possible," he stated as he watched her, her eyes glistening with unshed emotion.

"I know the feeling," she admitted softly as she lent forward but he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, stopping her and she looked at him slightly confused.

"What is it?" she prompted, watching as he began to fidget somewhat nervously, sensing her gaze on him.

"Ten years. I can't believe it's been ten years since you walked into my life…and you still amaze me," he stated, intense eyes meeting hers as he continued "And I want to spend the rest of my life with you,"

She stared into his eyes, feeling her heartbeat accelerate at his words. She continued to watch him silently as he reached into his pocket, pulling out a small blue box.

"Maggie," he stated shakily, flipping open the lid to reveal a small, dazzling engagement ring "Marry me," he stated softly, watching for her reaction.

She felt her heart constrict, unable to form words as she gave him a small nod as she reached out her hand. He captured her hand in his as he picked up the ring trailing it along her left ring finger. She still couldn't find the words as she pulled him to her, arms locked around each other in a tight embrace before she pulled back, kissing him soundly, their breathing ragged when they finally pulled apart.

"You think it would get easier the second time," he murmured with a smile and she gave a small chuckle in response before recapturing his lips against hers.

"I love you, so much," she finally whispered as she leant her head against his, meeting his eyes.


	19. Part 3

**Part 3**

Maggie stared at her reflection in the mirror, not quite believing that it was finally happening.

She heard a small knock on the door and she turned to see a beaming Tom Croydon by the doorway. "They're almost ready," he stated, his proud eyes scanning her form. "You look beautiful Maggie,"

She smiled at his words, slightly self conscious at all the attention as she turned back towards the mirror. "Thank you," she whispered, as she took a deep breath steadying herself.

"Everything alright?" he asked slightly concerned as he watched her eyes cloud over momentarily.

She gave a brief nod, finally turning from her reflection. "I just wish that they could have been here", she stated softly, a tinge of sadness in her voice.

"Your Dad?" he asked knowingly, hating the fact that Pat Doyle was currently sitting in a jail cell on his only daughter's wedding day.

"My family," she whispered with remorse and he nodded his head, she was the last Doyle left standing.

He did not say anything but wrapped his arms around her and she fell into his embrace, thankful for the comfort.

She pulled back and let the smile reform on her face. "Time for a new beginning," she stated softly and he gave a nod, offering his arm to her. "Are you ready?" he asked, waiting.

She felt the smile form on her face as she took one last glance at her reflection, her last moments as Maggie Doyle and she gave a nod. "Couldn't be more ready," she stated as she took his arm as he led her towards the ceremony.

The music filtered through the air, and with a slight murmur the crowd rose as Maggie slowly entered the church. She looked down the aisle, relieved to see his shinning blue eyes staring back at her. PJ stood there, his mouth dry as she walked radiantly towards him. She was absolutely beautiful, her dress an exact replica of her mother's, her hair drawn up with stunning tiny flowers, her own smile mirroring his. She had never been more beautiful. He had never felt so lucky.

He watched in silence as she detangled herself from Tom, placing a peck on his cheek as she did so. He locked eyes with her for a moment, and he had no doubts as he saw his own feeling reflecting back at him.

"Dearly beloved," The Reverend began, but the words just washed over him, his gaze refusing to break from her. Maggie could not contain her smile as she stared back at him, there was no need for words.

The reverend cleared his voice slightly and both turned to him, slightly startled.

"Both Maggie and PJ have expressed their wish to state their own vows. Maggie would you please state to PJ the vows which you wish to impart," the Reverend stated, giving her a smile.

Maggie gave a small nod, meeting his shinning eyes briefly as she passed Chris her bouquet, claiming his hands in hers as she turned to face him. He locked eyes with her, and she felt the rest of the world fall away, as she focused on him, the emotion welling.

"PJ," she began, her voice slightly shaky and she cleared her throat before continuing. "A part of me never thought we would get here, and now that we are I couldn't dream of being here with anyone else," she stated, growing more confident as she stood before him. "One thing I have learned in our time together is that life is unpredictable and that time is a gift, which has to be spent wisely. You are the person I want to walk life's windy road. You have been my strength, my eyes, my love and above all my best friend." She took a deep breath, swallowing the emotion threatening to overwhelm her. "You enrich me and make me a better person for having stood by your side. Today I pledge to you my honour, my life and above all my love," she finished, as she struggled to keep herself composed. She felt his thumbs trace along her hands comfortingly as she gave him a smile, his own eyes glistening.

"PJ could you please state to Maggie the vows which you wish to impart,"

PJ gave a small nod, taking a deep breath before relocking eyes with Maggie. "At times I've struggled to find the words to be able to express what you mean to me," he started, eyes expressive as he continued. "I love you Maggie" he stated, pausing to compose himself, "and if you let me, I will spend my life trying to make you as happy and as enriched as you make me feel," he admitted softly. "I pledge myself to you completely, to be your partner, your equal and your best friend. To be all that I can be and to love you wholeheartedly," he finished, composing himself as the silent communication flowed between them, the world falling away.

"Maggie and PJ will now impart rings as a symbol of their love and the vows which they have imparted. Can we have the rings please," the reverend instructed. Chris gave Maggie a beaming smile as she handed her the ring, as Nick placed the other in PJ's palm.

"Maggie would you please repeat after me," he stated and waited for the brief nod. "With this ring, I take the Patrick Joseph Hasham"

Maggie locked eyes again as she reached for his wedding hand, her own shaking in nervous joy. "With this ring, I take the Patrick Joseph Hasham," she repeated voice thick with emotion.

"To be my lawfully wedded husband," she recited the reverend's voice merely a whisper as she felt herself lost in his gaze. His face cracking with the smile at the word 'husband.'

"Come health, happiness, and prosperity, I will stand with you," she stated, the tears threatening to spill. "Come illness, trouble, or poverty, I will stand with you," she repeated. "Take this ring as a sign of my love and commitment," she finished, as she slowly slide the ring over the knuckle of his ring finger. He took her hand in his, having a moment between them, as the reverend continued.

"With this ring, I take you Margaret Anne Doyle, to be my lawfully wedded wife," PJ stated, enjoying the sound of the word roll off his tongue. "Come health, happiness, and prosperity, I will stand with you; come illness, trouble, or poverty, I will stand with you. Take this ring as a sign of my love and commitment," he finished as he savored the memory of sliding the golden ring upon her finger, a moment he had dreamed of, a moment he had thought lost to him.

"By the power vested in me, I pronounce you husband and wife," he stated and neither bothered waiting for the cue as they stepped towards each other, having suppressed the desire during the entire ceremony. He felt her lips against his, his wife's lips and he trembled slightly with the thought. They broke apart slightly, vividly aware of the need to be appropriate for the occasion. He entangled her hand in his, drawing her closer, as they made their way down the aisle, confetti and petals being mercilessly thrown upon them.


End file.
